We're the Joneses

What If

( one little thing: these will be different stories about Mr. and Mrs. Jones. They're kinda like Headcanons?? So she might be pregnant in this fanfic but in the other she won't. Yknow what im sayin??? )
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"Fool!" Natalie smacked the back of Tim's head, "I told you to drive to McDonalds!"

"Ouch, babe! What the hell?" Tim flinched in pain, quickly moving an arm behind his head, just in case she tried to slap him upside the head again.

"You've been craving that for two weeks already, hun. It's too much junk." Tim added on to finish his sentence.

"You're junk." Natalie mumbled beneath her breath and behind those gritted teeth.

"Excuse me?" Tim turned to face her as they were just stopped by a red street light. The traffic wasn't its usual turtle motion. He thanked Heavens, it had been a long, sweaty day. The last thing he wanted was to deal with angry, rushing drivers.

"I said I wanted some chicken nuggets." she rested her arms down, looking out the window. Sure, she was moody about not getting McDonald's but she just new something was off about her. She didn't feel normal. She was eating things she usually wouldn't, started getting heavily emotional. She was probably exaggerating but explain to her why her period was already two weeks late. Something was up: 'what if I have cancer?' she began to silently freak out, getting way too ahead of herself with the worst.

"We have rice and chicken salad at home." he grasped her hand, to which she responded by pulling her hand back to her and saying:

"I hate you for that!" The lights flashed green

"What's up with you?" he was genuinely concerned for his wife, surely she wasn't the only one that noticed her acting strange. He slammed on the wheels, only a few more minutes until their destination home. 'she's probably tired'
he said to himself. "Are you tired?"

"Yes! No? I want to go home." making a turn, she spotted home from a distance. She began to unbuckle herself and right when they made the stop, she didn't wait for him to open the door for her. She just swiftly walked out and through the door.

Tim let out a groan, throwing his head on the head rest while rubbing his forehead. He stood like that for a few moments before deciding they should talk, "Women." she shut down the car.

As he approached the door steps, he noticed it was closed. No problem, at least he had the keys... Or he thought he did. Going through each pocket, carefully, he shook and wiggled to try and get out anything he could possibly have but he ended up having; what's the spanish word for nothing? Nada.
Alright, it probably wasn't even locked - "Jesus Christ, Natalie!" he slammed on the door, "open the damn door." he heard footsteps, the chances of Natalie giving up so quickly weren't likely. So he began to climb their back fence and located the bathroom window, surprisingly that's where she was. He began to tap at it, "Babe, I'm sorry!". Then she raised and eyebrow, questioning his apology. "I really am!" he insisted. "Look: can we just talk about it for a second?". That's when he caught her attention, she still didn't budge but she did make eye contact, "I'm sorry I didn't take you to McDonalds but please for the love of God, don't make me sleep in the bathtub.

She had it. That was it. She closed the curtains on his face and continued to remove her makeup. "Men." Natalie rolled her eyes, wiping out her eye shadow and blush.

"Alright, alright. Think, Tim, Think.
What is one place Natalie wouldn't lock in the house?" The back door. She didn't actually think he would make it to the backyard, why would she lock the door- nope, it was locked. Just as he was about to go back to the front door and ring the hell out of that bell, he spotted a toothpick. He had the victory, that was all he needed. Good enough to be a key and what do you know? The door creeked open. He wanted to give her a scare, one she would never forget. What better place than her walk in closet? She used it a lot after all. Sneaking in, he realized how girly she can actually be. That made him snicker- oh wait. Here she comes. He held his standing position.
3... 2... 1

"AH!" came a huge echoing scream from Natalie as she immediately slammed the door back closed. Tim exited the closet door, seconds after with the most satisfied laugh ever.

"What did they hire you as the boogyman now?!" Natalie was red in the face from the fright.

"I'm sorry, that was priceless." he clapped continuing to burst out into laughter. He found it so hilarious that his laugh wasn't getting any lower. His laughing seemed to grow exponentially.

There came a sniff. Along with red,  watery eyes. Oh shi- it was at that moment Tim knew, he f*cked up.
"oh no no no, honey. Why are you crying?" Good grief, things couldn't get worse.

"You're laughing at me!" Natalie teared up, hiding it behind her fuzzy, dark locks.

"No! Babe, that was-.  I was being stupid," he removed her hair from covering her cheeks, to the back of her ear. "You've been acting up." he finally spoke.

"You realized it too?" she turned him. He gave her a small nod. "oh man!" she burst out into tears of flooding rivers that began to soak out her top.

The best Tim could do was rub her back and encourage her to talk about it. "What's been going on, you've never cried this much? You're even scaring me a little"

"I haven't had my period in two weeks." she wiped her tears. "and I don't know, I'm probably dying! Tim, I couldn't explain it enough even if I wanted to!"

Tim rested his chin on his hand at her first sentence. It took him a few seconds for his brain to snap it in him that she could be- oh man this is good. She totally is-. Tim felt not the smile that grew on his face while Natalie rambled off.

"Tim! What the hell? Are you even listening? Stop smiling like that!" she hit his shoulder to get his attention.

"You're not dying." he shook his head.

"You went from boogyman to doctor."

"Natty, can't you see?" he extended his arms out to her abdomen, running his thumb on her, "You're not dying, you're actually growing life."

Natalie froze. Shaking her head stubbornly, "No." she backed away.
"No! We can't have a bab-"

"Natalie, don't. Remember we talked about this in Morocco? How I could be an actual travel writer, for real. Maybe we could even have a child."

"That was hypothetical, Tim! Besides, we don't want to get too excited. We don't know if I'm pregnant"

"Nat, how many times have we made love without a condom?" he was serious this time.

Natalie didn't know whether to laugh or to get mad. "I - I lost count."

"See? There it is!"

"But wait, sometimes I'm not actually on track with my period-"

"Natalie, stop fighting."

A loud silence came upon them. No words found. That second felt like an eternity. Their minds weren't thinking, no more racing thoughts. Then out of the silent fog, came a quivering question, "What's next?"

"We'll be okay." Tim reassured her.

"Alright." Natalie shook her head. "One more thing, Tim." once she knew he was listening, she began to walk back into her closet to get comfortable and let him with these words, "I get to pick the name."