Forbidden Love

Chapter 4

"Isi, let us in" Leifer demands as him and Darius bang their fists on my door, wanting me to emerge from my bedroom after I had been holed up in there since we returned from Magnus' pack. Four days had passed since I discovered the truth about 'my male' and I am finding everything so hard to wrap my head around and accept.

Since the moment we got together he had been so caring and it seemed as though we fitted perfectly together, he had confessed his love for me the day after we met and I knew I loved him then but I hadn't had the courage to tell him so until months later. That was the night he took my virtue.

I knew I wanted to only be with my mate and I had honestly thought that Thaddeus was my chosen mate, if destined mates still existed I'm sure we were it but I know that's impossible.

He had promised me that he loved me and would always love me, he told me he would make me his female as soon as he could so I gave him my virtue, thinking he would be my mate for life - he lied.

He deceived me.

I can only think that he used me for sex, he knew I wanted to save my virtue for my mate but still he made me love him and give away my virtue when he had no intention of making me his mate. He knew we couldn't be together, he knew that he was a lycan prince and that I was a werewolf but he still stayed with me, he pursued a relationship with me. He said he was with me because he loved me, but I doubt that now.

I don't know what to believe from Thaddeus' mouth. He has lied since the first day we met. How do I even know if he loved me? I know he told me he loves me but he also told me he'd make me his mate and he hasn't done so. All I could ever possibly be to him is a mistress - aren't they simply whores that are used for sex? Was this Thaddeus' intention all along?

Even with the knowledge of his lies and that he wants me as his mistress, I can't help but still love him.

I fell in love with him and I cannot imagine being with anyone else, being another male's mate. I may be going crazy being in this room for days but I am considering taking up his offer of being his mistress.

I was used to being without him, it ached my heart when we were apart but I still knew we were in love and would see each other soon. Now, I'm aching with a whole new pain where we are separated and potentially never to see each other again let alone be together again.

This pain makes me want to run away from my home, away from my pack, away from my responsibilities to form a good alliance by mating an Alpha and run to my male. Perhaps being his mistress won't be so bad? At least I would be with him.

"Isi" Darius is in front of me, a scream is stuck in my throat from his sudden appearance as I had been so lost in thought I hadn't felt them stop banging at my door, I hadn't even noticed Darius climbing in through my window just as Leifer was doing now.

"What?" I croak, my voice raspy from crying for days without talking to anyone "Do not waste your tears on him" Darius says, pulling me up from my slumped position against the door and he hugs me close. I sniffle pathetically "I can't stop, it hurts so much"

"He should be fucking glad he's the prince or I'd murder his ass" Leifer growls "He's a lycan as well Leifer, he'd kill you before you blink" Darius reminds him, rubbing my back softly and bringing me to the bed "Dad's worried about you, Mum almost came here with us" he continues.

"Do they know?" I ask "No, only Darius and I know - should we tell them?" Leifer asks "No, I don't want a rift between our pack and the royals it's best dad especially doesn't find out"

"Don't let him get away with this Isi! He has ripped your heart out! All this fucking time he's been stringing you along whilst he's got a whore back home in his shitty castle"