Conversations with God (Book 1 of With God Trilogy)

February 24, 2018

Waking up earlier, I asked God, "How's mom? How's dad?"

God knows how they are and I felt him saying that they are alright. I sighed. Mr. Kelly was surprised to see me awake, alone outside waiting for the sun to rise. "Hey, Janice! Early bird?"

I smirked. "Yep, kind of the earliest bird." Just joking. "Love that! At least you catch the worm! If that's the case, you could already work!"

I looked at him for three seconds until he laughed. "I'm sorry but I'm really a workaholic. For you, I mean get moving! Jogging, come on!"

He wears a loose white shirt and khaki shorts with a pair of black Adidas rubber shoes. While me, I do not know what to wear. Mr. Kelly's neighbors hand me down clothes? Oh well, I have no choice. At least they gave me something to wear which I should be thankful for. In the end, I chose the pink wife beater or we can say a pink tank top. I paired it with black sweatpants and oops slippers? There is no other shoes here but my light blue doll shoes or pink slippers handed to me from the neighbors.

Mr. Kelly thought is was a cute idea and a crazy one too. While we are walking down the street to the park, many people would look at my slippers and maybe think why am I in slippers? Mr. Kelly sensed that I am getting uncomfortable so he handed me his rubber shoes instead. "You know what, let us switch!"

What?! No! First of all, he has a bigger shoe size. Second, it would make him uncomfortable in wearing pink slippers that has a big cottony flower on it. It kind of looks like sleeping slippers.

"No, it's okay!" I said with a nod.

He looked at me with a blank look.

By the time we got to the park, the sun rose. People were seen jogging, walking, strolling. We started jogging all around the perimeter of the park. People were looking at me like I was not prepared for jogging, like I just woke up and ran to the park. It kind of hurt me when I saw people laughing at me. Mr. Kelly asked me again if I would like to switch. Again, I declined.

"You know, you are a hard-headed girl! But if you are going to stay like that, let me take off my shoes. Go ahead take it!" he took off his shoes and handed it to me.

"Sir, it's nice of you but sorry, I really cannot take it." I told him. "I'll just stay here and sit."

"Sit? You sure? Better do some exercises. Tried yoga?" he asked. I nodded sidewards. "I remember Olivia. She taught me yoga every week when we jog here together. Follow me! I'll try to remember some of her exercises." he added and tried to squat. "Ouch! That hurts!"

I laughed. "Okay, I think I can do that."

"Sorry for not being good at this. I know you could do better." Mr. Kelly laughed too as he try to touch his toes while standing. "Ohh. My back hurts."

I laughed again. "I think that's enough stretching Mr. Kelly. You could jog now. I think I can do stretches on my own."

"Okay, I'll be back. Maybe we can just take turns in wearing the shoes." He puts on his rubber shoes and started jogging.

While stretching, I'm also talking to God.

Me: Hi, Lord, good morning!

God: Good morning, Janice.

Me: Sorry for not talking to you lately. And sorry for not realizing that you can talk to me even without my headphones.

God: It's fine. How are you?

Me: Okay. I'm learning so many things Lord. To be thankful to what I have, to be simple, to be a good listener, to be a giver, to be thoughtful, to be—

As I continue, I think I stepped on someone's foot. No! It was Mr. Kelly's rubber shoes. Oh my gosh! So he really wanted that pink slippers with a flower huh? As I wear Mr. Kelly's shoes, I got a glimpse of a man walking on the other street that looks like dad. Is it he? I started to focus my eyes on the man but he got lost in my sight. I continued to follow his direction until he was gone. I sighed.

Me: I missed him, God. I missed him.

God: --

I did not hear any reply from God.

Me: God, why didn't he see me? I mean if it was him, I wish you had helped me see him.

God didn't reply.

"Dad? Please? Come to me." I thought.

After a while of walking the street, I remembered Mr. Kelly. "Oh yeah. I need to return this rubber shoes!"

Mr. Kelly approached me as he saw me from afar. "Hey, I was looking for you. Where have you been?"

"I thought I saw him. My dad. So, I followed him. But he was gone." I said while a tears rolled down my cheeks.

Mr. Kelly hugged me and patted my back. "It's alright. It's alright. I'll let you wear my shoes going home." he made a gesture.

"What?!" I felt guilty. "It's okay, let me switch with you."

"No, Janice! I prefer to be a girl once in my life. At least I have one of my to dos in my bucketlist checked.!" he smirked and flashed his eyebrows.

I laughed. I don't know if that is true or maybe he is just making me laugh. I will admit I did feel better. Yeah, because of that joke, if it is.

Seeing my dad and coming home is now what I needto feel at my best.