Secrets

I still have feelings...

Song: Lost boy

—Y/N's POV—

As I walk to my locker, kids stare at me and whisper to each other. It's because of my dull e/c eyes. My eyes have been dark ever since I was a kid. Happiness left me when my best friends left me to cry when I was bullied. They turned into the people who bully me. It broke me and left my heart crying for help that would never come. I rolled my eyes and pretended that I couldn't see them staring. I got to my locker and got my history book out. I throw my backpack into the locker and close it. I walk to class and sit in the back. The teacher never noticed me, except at attendance. I was kind of glad that we had uniforms. The only problem is, the uniform has short sleeves. I try and hide my arms during the lesson. When class is over I put my history book in my locker, and walk to music. It is traditional that the freshmen sing first, apparently... Unfortunately, I am the only freshman in the class. I grit my teeth as the teacher motions for me to go to the front. I walk up front and listen to the class mutter smack talk at me. I smirk in my mind and take a deep breath.

"This song is called Lost Boy," I say loud enough for them to hear.

I sing quietly at first, but -without me noticing- I sing louder after a while. When I finish there is silence, then applause. I quickly sit back down and pretend to ignore the compliments I get from students. The boy sitting next to me was glancing at me from time to time for the rest of the lesson. I acted like I didn't notice. When class ends, I walk to my locker and the boy who was sitting next to me is next to it. I see him open the locker next to mine and he grabs his geometry book. I see that he has cuts on his arms... he is wearing a sad expression. I grab my geometry book and follow him to class. I sit next to him. He looks surprised that I sat next to him but he shakes it off and looks down.

"H-hey," I hear him say.

"Hi..." respond quietly.

"Why did you sit next to me?"

"You looked lonely. I know what it feels like to be lonely and I related..."

"O-oh..." he responds.

I look at his cuts and I cry on the inside. He grabs my arm and compares it to his. I have WAY more cuts than him. He looks at me with a shocked expression.

"What's wrong...?"

"Y-your arm... why so m-many..." he asks me tears forming in his eyes. I give him a weak smile.

"Hey... what's your name?" I ask avoiding the question.

"My name is Alex," he says as he lets go of my arm.

"I'm Y/N."

He writes something on a piece of paper and hands it to me.

"Call me if you ever feel like cutting, ok?"

"T-thanks..." I say and the teacher starts the lesson.

The rest of the day was okay, Alex and I have a few classes together. He is so nice... it's too bad he has depression too. If only I could somehow make him smile. It would give me so much relief... I walk home alone avoiding everyone as much as possible. When I walk into my house there is a note on the counter. It's from mom. She is staying at work until 11:30. I'll have to make my own dinner. I grab ramen from the cabinet and heat up water. I pour the water into a bowl with the ramen. As I wait for the ramen to soften up, I look at pictures of me, my mom, and my dad. My mom was so happy... if only dad hadn't left all those years ago... it would all be ok. I am about to cry so I walk away from the pictures and go to the kitchen. My ramen is ready, so I eat that and walk upstairs. I sat in my room and listened to music. After about an hour of music, I turn it off. I am so tempted to cut, but I don't. Then I remember Alex. I grab my phone and call him.

Y= you  A= Alex

Y- hey Alex?

A-hey Y/N, what is it?

Y- I'm really stressed right now.

A- okay, just talk to me about it. What's wrong?

Y- memories...

A- I see, well tell me what you saw.

Y- I keep seeing my father, the note he left, and how my mom smiled when my dad was with us...

A- Damn... you have had it bad, haven't you...

Y- I guess...

A- listen, don't feel alone anymore. You're gonna be fine. Just hold on, I'm here for you now, don't be afraid to tell me anything. I will always be here if you need me. Now get some sleep, Y/N...

Y- T-thank you... so much... I'll see you tomorrow.

A- bye... Y/N...

I hung up and I was crying. I couldn't stop. I was overwhelmed and I have hope now. I can make it through... I'll do it for my mom, and Alex. I slowly drift off to sleep and dream... nothing. The next morning, mom was already gone for work, so I ate some toast and ran to school. I bumped into someone as I ran. I hit the ground really hard my arm was bleeding.

"Are you ok?" Someone says as they hold their hand out.

I look up and see a boy with brown hair and green eyes looking down at me.

"Y-yeah I'm fine..." I lie as I take his hand.

"You're bleeding!"

"Really, I'm fine I've had much worse than a simple scrape." He winces as I say that.

"I'm gonna take you to the nurse anyway." He says grabbing my wrist and pulling me.

He is hurting my cuts as He drags me away. I bite my tongue so I don't yell in pain. He is stronger than me, so I can't get away from him. He takes me into the nurse's office. The nurse gasps at my cuts and grabs the bandage. The boy is just standing there watching her bind my cuts. He looks worried and there is a look of guilt on his face. I kind of feel sorry for him, he shouldn't blame himself for this. The nurse finishes and sends me and the boy to class.

"I'm really sorry- uh, what's your name?"

"Y/N," I say.

"I'm sorry Y/N. My name is Blake by the way."

"Nice to meet you."

We have History together apparently, so I sit next to him. He has Literature next so he walks me to music and leaves. I sit next to Alex and he smiles. He is actually smiling... I give him a weak smile back. His once dull blue eyes are sparkling. For once I think he is happy... I wonder why...

HELLO!!!! I hope you guys are enjoying the story! I am having a fun time writing my stories, and I hope you are having fun reading them. If you ever need support contact me and I will give some support if you need it! Once again, YOU ALL ARE AMAZING!!!!!!!!!

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