She's Dead Inside

The funeral

April 26, 2004
It was the morning of the date everyone was not expecting to come so early. Jacklyn had drawn so many pictures she raised enough money to have a proper funeral for her brother.

Her mother helped her into a black dress, but decided to let her hair down. Jacklyn's black hair seemed to fitted for the theme but was too beautiful to be braided.

As Jacklyn and Julie walked downstairs, they see Chris sitting on the couch with his face in his hands. Chris was not ready to see his son in a casket, he was not ready to see his son lifeless, pale or alone. He is used to seeing the big and bright smile of his. Hand in Jacklyn's hand.

"Come on Chris, we can do this. We have to do this."

As they drove to the site, Jacklyn sat quietly looking out the window.

"What if it was me?" She oddly spoked. Julie looked back at her, confusion written on her face.

"What do you mean?"

Jacklyn stared at her mother's face for a long time before answering.

"What if Vontay was in the seat here, and I was the one you were going to see get buried." Her mother, sat there quiet, staring at her daughter. Her father however spoke up.

"We would be on our way to see you get buried, just like we are for Vontay. We will cry, we will be broken. Because we lost our daughter. So don't say that. We do not want to lose you. We don't want to lose Vontay, but we did. Now you're all we have. Understand?"

Jacklyn quietly said yes and stayed quiet the whole ride there.

Stayed quiet during the funeral..that was until her father asked her to say a few words. For a normal four year old, they'd be scared. But no four year old is as special as she.

"Hi..my name is Jacklyn Ace West. I am Vontay Blake West twin sister. I was um..older by three minutes, that's what daddy said. But I don't think that's really im-im-important." She looked at her mom.

"I asked mommy on the way here a question, but I didn't really want to know the answer. Vontay is my best friend, we did everything together. I love Vontay, he always makes me laugh, I will miss him. But mommy said he's always going to be watching over us."

Jacklyn looked up at the sky and waved with a smile. Trying to pretend cheerful she said "Hi Vonyy, can you hear me? If so, I'm going to eat all your candy."

She then looked at his lifeless body and put their favorite toy next to him, kissed his forehead and whispered.

"You shouldn't have left me here by myself Vonyy, you know how I get. Mommy and daddy don't but you do. Why'd you leave me Vonny? Why?"

Wiping her eyes, she walked back to her parents and sat down. She stared at the coffin, then looked away as it got lowered.

Whispering under her breath she stared at the gave hole, "I love you Vontay, forever..I hope you stay cheerful up there."