Tainted| The Realest Book You'll Ever Read

Turning a New Leaf

This is the last chapter of this book. The main reason being a record of a dark point in my life. It all started because I everything was being thrown at me at once. I couldn't handle it. I kind of gave up. I felt so selfish. It was like I needed to punish myself everyday. It came to a point where I became totally fake. I betrayed myself as a person. I felt helpless. It was like anytime I tried to pick myself up I would fall back down. My sanity was at a low. Anytime I did something it was without thinking. I felt like a bad friend to everyone. So much hatred was building up inside me that anytime I went home I was mad. I lost sight of my purpose in life. I would also be very exhausted all the time after school because I would waste so much energy putting on an act that I was fine. Some classes I couldn't keep up the act. I would only keep it up if people I cared about. I was restless. I cried the least as possible. I would be proud of not showing sadness. When I did cry, I was alone. I would cry a lot when I was alone. I hated it so much but no matter what I did, I would repeat the cycle of pretending, getting angry, and then crying. But now, I can try. I'm going to be in a new environment soon. New people, new everything. I'm going to try to get better. I'm going to try to be myself. I'm going to try to change into a person I want to be. That's why I need to end this book. I'm going to rename it too. I'm also starting a new one. I hope you guys liked reading this really depressing book of my unstable feelings. This is the end of it. TheQuakez out!!!!!