I will try to fix you (Andley)

Chapter four

Andy hit me and laughed out loud. I didn’t scream, I didn’t say anything. A second hit. A third, a fourth, a fifth. Then I couldn’t take it anymore. “Aahhh” I moaned in pain, tears falling from my eyes now. “Stop it” I cried. “P-please” I begged him. “Never” he glared. “I love to see you in pain”

“Please-please stop it aahhhh” I cried.

“Ash? Ashley?”  Andy gently shook me awake. I screamed, terrifying he would hit me again. “Shh… Ashley, it’s okay. It was all a bad dream… Shh…”  Andy hugged me and clutched me to his chest. “I-I’m sorry, did I-I wake you up?” I asked when I came to my senses again. “Yeah, but don’t worry about that buddy, by the looks you had a nightmare.” Andy’s face looked so peaceful. Like he didn’t care I screamed him awake at 03.20 AM.

“Do you wanna tell me what it was about?” Andy softly asked, looking me straight in the eyes. I quickly nodded ‘no’. I didn’t wanna think back to it. A tear slowly slid down my face. Andy whipped it away. “Shall I stay here?” he asked. I nodded; of course fuck yes I wanted him to stay the night in my bunk! Of course I know there will nothing ‘happen’, but I just like the feeling of him, hanging around me.

I shifted in my bed, making space for Andy to lay down. I stared at the ceiling and saw the ‘plate’. I sniffled. “Ash? Are you okay?” Andy whispered. I pretended to sleep. I really hate it when I do that; when I was young, sometimes my uncle came looking for me in the evening when he went to bed. He always opened my door a bit to see if I was okay, if I slept, or if I wanted to talk. I always pretended to sleep. I never slept; I got just a little sleep as kid, now I still don’t get much sleep. I’m just to busy with thinking about things. I didn’t want my uncle to know I was depressive. That would be such a disappointment for him. I mean, I was his favorite cousin. And he was my favorite uncle, and I didn’t want to bother him with my problems. I sniffled again.

“Ashley?” Andy whispered again. I could keep the act until a stifled sob escaped. “Ashley” Andy said. “I-I’m sorry” I whispered. “Shh… it is okay Ashley” Andy wrapped his arms around me. We were still both laying in my bed. I lay my head down on his chest. “You know, I’m not a pillow” Andy giggled. I blushed. Thank god that it was dark in my bunk and he couldn’t see my blushing again. “I know that, Andy, but  you’re comfy” I giggled back. I imagined the smile that would be on Andy’s face now. Andy ruffled my hair and held me tighter.

“Good night Ashley” he whispered before pressing his lips softly against my head. “Good night Andy” I whispered back. And I fell asleep again, feeling so special now laying in Andy’s arms.

---

The next morning I woke up and felt something poking in my back. ‘Well god damn it’ I thought ‘what the fuck is that?’. Then I turned my head to see Andy sleeping next to me, with his elbow poking in my back. But hello, it was Andy. Suddenly I didn’t care anymore I woke up because of something poking in my back. I mean, it was Andy. I picked up my phone which was lying next to my pillow. I unlocked it and read the time. 10.17 AM. Wow, so late already? It surprises my Jake hasn’t woke us up yet.

By the time I thought that, I heard footsteps; Jake. I quickly closed my eyes again, pretending to sleep. “Hey, boys, wake up” Jake gently nudged me and Andy in our arms, causing us to open our eyes slowly. Andy immediately hugged me tight. “Morning Ash” he said giggling. “Wait, are you two…” Jake’s jaw dropped “Are you together?” he asked.

“No!” Andy immediately answered and let go of me. “No, Jake” I indignant said, a light fake laugh in my voice. It hit me so hard Andy had directly almost shouted no. you see, he doesn’t like me, he doesn’t like me at all. Nobody likes me. Andy got up and left the bunk without saying a word. I tried to swallow the lump in my throat.