Decode // Michael Clifford

Chapter 3

10 . 12 . 2008

I was happy to begin working on completely erasing Friday night’s memory from my mind over the next few days. Haley didn’t mention it after whining all day Saturday about how I’d made her go home “just when the party was getting started”, which I was grateful for. When things like this happened and her good time was ruined by me, she usually spent at least a week complaining about it.

On Wednesday afternoon as I walked across the courtyard towards our science building, my eyes caught a group of boys milling around. A few of them were smoking, the others laughing and pushing each other. There were a couple of older ones, that I knew. They were the ones mostly in charge. I knew, because for the past seven years of my life ever since I had an anxiety attack right in the middle of class, barely a day passed where they didn’t go out of their way to torment me.

Why me? That was a question I’d been asking myself for way too long. At this point, I had just learned to accept it and move on.

Of course, just my luck, they were right in the way of where I needed to go, and I steeled myself. I ducked my head and stared at the ground as I attempted to maneuver past them without being noticed.

“Weeeell, if it isn’t the freak,” David, the oldest one, taunted as I came nearer.

I winced. I should have known there was no way to get past them. I wanted to scream that I wasn’t a freak, that I wouldn’t be this way if I could help it at all, but it was no use. My mouth wouldn’t open, wouldn’t allow the words to come out. It never did.

I tried to keep walking, but I nearly ran straight into David as he took a step in front of me. He was tall and skinny, and quite honestly looked more my age than nearly 18, but his boyish face did nothing to quell my fear. 

“Aw c’mon, Hatsby, don’t leave the fun just yet!” James, a boy with light ginger hair, was leaning against the brick wall of one of the building, smoking a cigarette and leering at me.

David looked down at me, his hot breath that reeked of cigarettes and god knows what else, brushed across my face and nearly made me gag. “You’ve got such a pretty face, freak,” David said with a grin.

“Too bad she’s got such a fucking fat ass,” James added with a malicious smirk.

I closed my eyes, lower lip trembling, and tried to keep breathing. I wouldn’t have another attack right in front of them. I hadn’t had an anxiety attack in front of anyone except Michael ever since that day in 4th grade. I’d made sure of it. I tried to picture myself somewhere, anywhere, but there in that courtyard.

“Hey, David.”

The voice behind me wasn’t loud and angry. In fact, it was actually quite soft and pleasant, but even without seeing the expression of the speaker, one could sense the underlying anger and tension.

David’s head snapped up, and he gazed at the someone behind me. I stood there, clutching my books protectively against my chest, not wanting to turn around. Why did he keep finding me in the worst positions?

“Michael,” David said breezily, lifting a hand in welcome. “What’s up, man?”

I could feel Michael’s presence coming closer to me. David stepped away from me at last, and I felt the breath I’d been holding release out of my chest. Even though I knew Michael was younger than David, David still looked slightly intimidated by him.

I peeked over at Michael through my curls of hair. He looked much the same as usual—dark hair, dark coat, dark skinny jeans, dark vans, cigarette in his hand. He didn’t spare me a glance, his eyes trained on David instead. “You like your dope, right?” Michael asked sweetly, walking right up to him and looking him in the eye. He was just about the same height as David, as both of them were unnaturally tall.

David frowned. “Well, yeah, dude. I mean, it’s pretty—”

Michael cut him off. “You like your dope that I give you on a discount because you’re too fucking broke to afford it from anyone else, because you’re too much of an idiot to get a proper job, right?”

A flush crept onto David’s face and he glanced nervously over at his friends, who were watching intently. He nodded, slowly.

Michael flashed him a tight smile and kept eye contact with him as he lifted his hand and stubbed out his lit cigarette on David’s letter jacket. David flinched, but otherwise didn’t react. When he let the cigarette drop to the ground, a small hole was burned right through the fabric. “Then don’t bully innocent girls,” Michael warned, his voice still soft and pleasant.

David glared over Michael’s shoulder at me, and I dropped my gaze hurriedly. His eyes shifted back to Michael and he nodded. “Fine.”

As David and his friends left, Michael turned around to face me at last. His pale green eyes, that always looked slightly blue, searched for mine. “If it makes you feel any better,” he began, his voice returned to normal, “I like your ass.”

My eyes widened and I clutched my books tighter against my chest. “I have to go to class,” I blurted out, not responding to his comment.

He frowned at me and caught my arm, the contact making me freeze. I glanced down at his hand, trying not to let it show just how uncomfortable it made me to have another person touch me. “No thank you?” he asked, his eyes boring into mine. “I just saved you, you know?”

I swallowed harshly and wormed out of his grasp. “I didn’t need you to. I had it under control.”

“Had it under control? Quinny, they were about to tear you apart! You’re lucky I was here making a deal,” Michael protested, following me as I began to walk towards the science building. I was at least 10 minutes late to class by now, and I could feel the wrench in my gut as I pictured having to walk into class while everyone else sat.

“My name isn’t Quinny!” I yelled. To my embarrassment, tears sprung into my eyes. I didn’t want to cry in front of him for the second time in a week, so I wiped at them angrily. “It’s Quinn. My name is Quinn, and I’ve had it under control for the past seven years, Michael. I don’t even know you! You can’t just come into my life and expect to make me feel better or save the day. I’m fine on my own. I’m not dead yet, right?” I spat, anger coursing through my body. I didn’t even know where the anger came from. I was so rarely angry—it just wasn’t in my nature.

Michael watched me talk with an intense frown on his face. “David has been bullying you since you were nine?” he finally asked, eyebrows furrowed.

I glared at him. “Why do you care?”

Michael shook his head and sighed. “Fine. But here, call me the next time you don’t need to be saved.” He reached out for my hand and I flinched, but all he did was set a piece of paper in it. A piece of paper that obviously had his number on it.

He turned around and walked away, whistling under his breath, and I stood there for a solid minute, staring after him, before I turned in the opposite direction and headed towards Chemistry. 

- + - + - 

A/N: i feel like this is really short and shitty omg i’m so sorry but chapter 4 is much much longer and so much better ok so stay tuned :-) remember new chapters are up on thursdays!! if you like it (or don’t), please please let me know! xo