Learning To Trust Again

Chapter 2

        Waking up has become something I dislike greatly ever since my life took a turn for the worse. However, waking up is eventually inevitable for the living. My eyelids slowly open, and instantly they land on the cracked concrete ceiling above me. In the process of coming out of my sleep, the pain throughout my body hits me severely. As I become more alert the pain continues to accumulate, and a whimper leaves my blood-crusted lips. In an attempt to clear my mind, I inhale a deep breath in hopes of replenishing a lungful of air. My idea is immediately replaced with regret as pain shoots up from my chest. A sharp hiss of pain leaves my gaped lips and a pained expression twists onto my face. I make a quick mental note to only inhale shallow breaths, and I'm reminded of how Dale kicked me. He had kicked me fiercely multiple times in the chest and has most likely broken a few of my ribs.

Laying there for a few minutes I allow myself to recover from the unexpected pain. As I do so, I start focusing on the best ways to maneuver into a sitting position, but no matter what I know it's going to hurt like hell. Whenever Dale or any other pack members have found me laying down after a beating, they've made me regret it. Without giving myself any more opportunities to procrastinate on this task, I begin moving my core upwards. The pain in my chest and arms takes my breath away but I continue with what I've already started. I don't use my arms to assist me because that'll only create an entirely new pain for me to endure

This gruesome process takes me a few minutes, but using all my strength I make it up into a sitting position. Inhaling fast shallow breaths, I lean my back carefully against the cold cement wall before leaning my head back as well. Sweat covers my face and my body shakes slightly from exhaustion and lack of energy. Slowly catching my breath I can think much clearer with the pain in my body not being provoked. I find myself unthinkingly examining my body, knowing no one else cares what state my body is in. Pulling back my blood-stained t-shirt with my left hand I reveal the few bruises on my shoulders, and I only look for a second before continuing my self-assessment.

Looking down at my slightly bruised upper arms, a sense of relief that I hadn't been cut fills me. My hands grab the hem of my t-shirt and as I lift it darker bruises begin to appear. Some people would probably gag at their dark colors and vast sizes on my chest and stomach, but I've grown accustomed to their presence on my body. Lightly I run my fingers over my stomach, and even the lightest touch sends waves of pain. I finally let go of my shirt, letting it fall and cover the morbid masterpiece inflicted by my brother. Continuing down my body I access my upper thighs and legs, they being the least injured. Some cuts from earlier encounters are still scabbed and healing, but no fresh injuries are present.

There's no way I can check how bad my face and neck are, but my right hand gently begins feeling around. Dull pain registers when my fingers brush against my neck, and going to my face there are some definite bruises. Touching my eyes I think I have a black eye on my left eye, but without a mirror I'm uncertain. I'm thankful that no objects were used because the aftermath could've been significantly worse for me. I've been whipped, cut by knives, burned by hot rods, and tortured by an endless list of other things. Dale probably decided to come pay me a visit on a whim and didn't have the time to grab anything to use on me. Having Dale as the Alpha causes him to be busy and at times he's forgotten about me for weeks. The beatings don't necessarily go away, because Dale isn't the only one who comes down here, however, they occur less.

Sitting alone, the time blurs together and I'm left with nothing but my inextinguishable thoughts. Memories are a peculiar thing because no matter how many years have passed I'm still able to remember how this all happened years ago. In my pack, the Ash-Wood Pack, once the Alpha's and Luna's child turns 13-years old they walk through the pack's entire territory. I remember how jubilant and over-filled with excitement I'd been. The night before I continuously peeked at my nightstand clock waiting for the morning hours to arrive. My entire pack was so proud of me, and I especially remember how proud Dale had been of me that day.