Playing A Dangerous Game

◄ Chapter 27 ► You Can't Sulk Around

◄ Chapter 27 ► You Can't Sulk Around

"Monica sweetheart." My mom came up in my room for the tenth time this morning.

Like always I didn't say anything. The past two days i've completely isolated myself. I've stayed hidden in my room not wanting to leave. I even missed a cheer practice.

I didn't care.

Today was Saturday which means Madison's sleepover is tonight. I definitely wasn't going now.

"Monica." Before she could even sit on my bed I quickly turned away from her and pulled my covers over my head.

I closed my eyes and held my arms to the chest.

It never works you know.

The pain just stays. I was hoping that it would just go away but it didn't. Nothing could make this burning hole in my chest go away. So I chose to ignore it the best I could. Sometimes I couldn't sometimes it demanded to be felt and I hated it. So I pushed all thoughts of Derek aside. It didn't help knowing that he was the only one who hasn't called me.

"Monica you can't sulk around like this." She says gingerly placing her hand on my arm.

"Who's sulking?" I mutter.

At least I talk. Most girls don't even talk when they're heartbroken. I may sound depressed but I still talked.

"You are and you know it." She says squeezing my arm.

"No, I'm wallowing in my own sadness. Not sulking." I turn to face her, pushing the covers away from my face.

"That's sulking sweetheart." She says genuinely and I felt tears prick my eyes.

I knew I was sulking. I just chose not to use the term because I hated that word. It made it seem like I had to care deeply enough about someone to sulk about them. In no way did I ever feel that strongly about someone. Especially not Derek Reid.

"It hurts mom." I cry and she quickly reaches for me, pulling me into a hug.

"I know baby I know."

This is why I didn't love. I didn't want this. I didn't want to become dependent on someone else. I didn't want to get so attached to the point where I couldn't live without them. I definitely didn't want to deal with the ache of heart break.

My phone buzzes on my nightstand and I lay back in my bed. My mom rolls her eyes and takes it upon herself to answer it.

"Hello?" I groan and roll back on my side. "No this is her mother, Monica is feeling a little under the weather right now." She says and I scoff.

Yeah nice way to sugar coat it mom.

"A Madison ways to know if you'll still be coming to her sleepover?" She directs towards me, covering the mic.

I wasn't in the mood for people and I shook my head.

"She said she'll try." My mom says into the phone. "You too." She smiles. "Ok bye." When she hung up the phone she rolled her eyes. "She had to much energy." She places the phone back.

"Mom I don't want to go." I roll on to my back.

"I think this will be good for you. Get your mind off things for awhile." She gives me an assuring smile.

I huff and sit up. The pain seeming more prominent.

"If you really think so then i'll go." I sigh, running my hair through my hair. "But I refuse to enjoy myself." I give her a pointed look.