noun, definition:
1) watching his eyes light up less and less when he looks at you
2) hearing the tired tone in his voice and wondering if you're the one that made it that way
3) picking yourself apart in the mirror every morning to "see if your acne's getting any better" but really you make it worse by pinching your cheeks with the same greasy fingertips that wiped away your tears
4) being terrified to start liking someone because you know they won't like you back
5) knowing that all of your friends are embarrassed by you
6) also knowing that your favorite teacher thinks you're an annoying weirdo
7) refusing to sing outside of rehearsal because your voice is damaged but also, what would people think of your dumb musical songs??
8) not wanting anyone to see you before you go to bed, like actually though retainer and glasses and wet slick hair and all
9) being afraid that boys won't love you because you look like a boy even though you like being somewhat ambiguous
10) constantly second guessing
11) constantly dodging compliments but craving them at the same time
12) wishing you were never alive to feel all this
