Taylor

Taylor II

"Kude ko a tou pruuna'att?" my dad asks me while preparing dinner. He's asking if I'm going out with my boyfriend, as he simultaneously listens to a Cassian podcast about economics or something. "Sie, akiina paer'a the" I reply, indicating that I am. I'm sitting at the kitchen table right now, beneath one lone hanging lamp that radiates a soothing dim light onto me. I'm watching my phone intently, trying not to get too excited, positively or negatively. I'm just waiting for that "outside" text so that I can leave. It's not that I don't like being here with my parents; I love them. It's just that...my boyfriend said this date would be different. I'm hoping to God that he is right.

Titan and I have been seeing each other for a little over a year. It's been...intense, to say the least. We met on the street, like some kind of cheesy romance movie. He had the most beautiful bright red eyes and hair down to his shoulders. I don't run into many Lokan boys with braids, but he had them at the time. And I loved it. We locked eyes for a very brief second before I saw him smirk and stop walking. So I stopped as well, but I didn't turn around. I heard him ask, "Sie kekaar yah tou yaahnokko?" wanting to know what my name is. I blushed a little, turning around to meet his gaze and replied, "Taylor. Ver collosir yaahno'me sie 'Tip'... Sie tou cre'eqa a yah ver collosi?" I figured myself kind of clever, telling him what my friends call me, and then asking if he wanted to be my friend. I wanted to pretend like I was the kind of girl that took charge and was not afraid to show initiative. I saw my meeting him as an opportunity to be someone different, but he saw right through that tough façade. "Sie," he replied, "Tumoh yah collosir." From that moment, we were friends as he claimed. He would go out of his way to run into me after I texted him what I was doing that day. He would bring me food, pretending to have gotten too much for himself. He pretty much swept me off my feet.

It wasn't all great, though. In a couple months, I would discover that he isn't exactly...great at holding conversations. It's totally different talking to someone that you're aiming to date, about how much you like them and what you'd do to them in bed, rather than someone you're already with and talking to them about anything else of substance. The offenses began very small. We'd be talking about something and he would cut me off very sharply when I went to even slightly disagree, often telling me that what I was saying was "stupid" or "boring". I gave him the benefit of the doubt, assuming he may have been stressed by school or something. It came to just annoy me more than anything. It became very normal, and it didn't seem to change much even when I brought it to his attention. It got worse, in fact.

I remember we were over at a mutual friend's house. Her name is Jill, and we both had classes with her at one point or another, so she knew both of us separately. I liked that, because I knew that if I ever really needed impartial advice with goings-on with him, I could come to her. But this time, I didn't need to.

We were all kind of laid out on the couches and the floor, vegging out with some snacks and drinks watching a movie. I was having a great time. We got to talking about the movie, like, everyone was discussing some part of it. An actor or something, I believe. I said, "Yeah, I remember seeing him in that show about the doctor and his students or whatever." "What, House?" Titan asked, looking over his shoulder to me from his position beneath me on the floor. I was on the couch behind him and I looked down to see what he was talking about.

"That guy wasn't in House," he said arrogantly.

"Yeah," I uttered, rolling my eyes up to make sure I was recalling correctly.

"No he wasn't!" he laughed, lying back down and texting. "Damn...why are you so fuckin' stupid?"

The whole room went quiet aside from the TV. I'm pretty sure that everyone was trying to avoid the awkwardness of having to say something on my behalf, worried of how it would make me feel, needing someone else to stand up to my own boyfriend for me. I was flabbergasted. And I realized that the longer I stayed quiet, the weaker I looked. Eventually, just as I was about to speak up, Titan looked around at everyone. "What?" he asked, seeming as though he was truly of no conviction that he did anything wrong, "I was joking! Y'all are so tight. I thought we were having fun."