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JANE WAS DEPRESSED. There was no denying it. She was almost as depressed as she was when Ally passed. She could remember it so clearly. That night two years ago.
Mother woke me in the night. Tears streaming, her movements frantic. I asked what was happening, but she couldn't even bring herself to speak. I was terrified. She eventually got me to get up, and to the car, where my siblings were sitting, as frightened as I was. I remember asking Martin what was happening, but all he did was shrug. Mother drove, shakily, through the rain and darkness, towards a destination we didn't know. I didn't even think how odd it was at the time that Dad and my younger sister Ally, weren't with us.
They had gone out very late, Ally needing something from the grocery store. But they hadn't returned by the time our bedtime was, which was usual. Dad loved adventure. And Ally thrives on it. Mother finally pulled into the hospital parking lot and that's when I knew. I think I always knew deep down. I thought it was just anxiety from Mother's actions. It wasn't. It was emptiness. Emptiness because someone I loved wasn't here anymore. I couldn't even get out of the car without Martin's help, I was sobbing so hard, shaking all over. Tyler was in shock, he was a year too young to understand what was happening, what I had processed. Martin was hyped up on adrenaline, not yet processing what was wrong. I zoned out completely until we got to Dad's room. I didn't even think of Ally in that moment, seeing Dad hooked up to a dozen beeping machines was enough to trigger a panic attack.
My heart sped up, my chest constricting, taking my breath away in great heaves. Martin took me to the waiting room with Tyler, practically carrying me. We sat there for almost two hours. Just us, holding hands, lost in our minds. Mother finally came to find us, calm and collected. But I could see it was just a front. I could see through her cracks, her better half wasn't with her. He was lying in a hospital bed with a collapsed lung and a skull fracture. That's when it occurred to me. The last words I spoke before my world crashed down forever. "Where's Ally"?
Ally was her better half, her younger sister, her best friend. And one drunk driver took her away. Her Father healed, and came home. But Ally never stepped foot in that hospital. She was gone the second the car wrapped around that tree. Sometimes Jane still looks for her, when she thinks of an old inside joke, or remembers an old and embarrassing memory that the two of them shared. Jane's childhood died that day. In that cold waiting room, in a dimly lit hospital. The rain pouring outside.
Losing a child is one of the hardest things a parent can go through. But you never realize how much it hurts a child. A child who shares everything with the other. The other being their better half, their best friend. Their home. And Jane was starting to think Sadie could fill that place. Sadie could be her home. But she was too scared to lose her. She already lost her home once, she didn't think she could do it again.
.✫*ﾟ･ﾟ｡.★.*｡･ﾟ✫*.
she speaks
hi I'm EMO bc of the con that just happened that I wasn't at oh whale but yeah ST3 is filming and I'm happy
