An Expectant Whirlwind

Internal Panicking

Marinette had done a lot of crying lately. She didn't know if it was the supposed pregnancy hormones or just that she, a sixteen year old girl, was very likely going to have a baby. She figured it was both, but she was surprised to find that in the moment of truth, she didn't feel like crying at all.

Maybe she couldn't. Maybe her eyes had run dry and there was nothing left to let out anymore. Every thought had run through her mind, every choice was considered, but she was still at a loss. Crying was supposed to make her feel better, so maybe her body had given up because it wasn't helping.

So when those two words left the doctor's lips, she didn't cry. There was no lump in her throat or the moist feeling in her eyes she became so familiar with. Her mother grabbed her hand and gently squeezed, letting her know that she was there and it was okay to be scared.

Was she scared? Most definitely. Even though she imagined her suspicions being confirmed a dozen times already, the real confirmation wasn't any less daunting.

She was terrified.

The doctor proceeded to talk to her mother, but Marinette wasn't listening. Though she wasn't crying, she was panicking. The two words echoed in her mind.

You're pregnant.

Some people would weep with joy over those words. Others would probably just weep. Depending on the people and situation, those words brought different reactions. Marinette couldn't pinpoint what her reaction was exactly, but she could feel her heart pick up its pace and her stomach flutter uncomfortably.

You're pregnant.

No tears, she was breathing fine, she couldn't say she was shocked either, but she could feel her hands begin to shake as her insides flipped and collapsed into itself.

I'm pregnant.

And out came all her internal panicking, onto the floor with a sickening hurl.

-

On the way home, Marinette drummed her fingers nervously against her thigh. She watched the cars pass by in front of them as they waited on the traffic light. The soft music from the radio was white noise behind the whirling of her mind.

Now that it wasn't just a possibility,the certainty of her pregnancy brought different thoughts. Like how was she going to tell people? She knew everyone she was close to wouldn't judge her, at least not harshly, but questions would be asked.

Who was the father?

When did it happen?

How did it happen?

What was she going to do?

Would she keep it? If so, how would she graduate high school?