P i e c e s O f M e (Supernatural Destiel Fanfic)

Pt. 1: T i m e & T i m e A g a i n

                                                        *Pieces Of Me*

        Some days Castiel would just watch humanity, watch people interact. They all were so imperfect, they hugged, touched, loved. He could remember the dawn of time, no humans, no nothing, just the earth the wind and the stars. Life was much simpler then. Life was just living day to day, surviving and doing what needed to be done.

        Castiel had lived this way for billions of years, doing as he was told and never questioning an order. That was until he met Dean, his one and only true friend. The second he met him he felt a connection. They were one and the same, both had fathers that M.I.A, both had pain buried deep inside of them just waiting to crawl its way to the surface and break out into the world.

        Castiel had seen it the first time he met Dean, that spark in his eye, that light. It was Dean's pain that kept him moving day to day, even from the beginning. His lust to make things right in the world. This light, that was what Castiel loved about humanity. They didn’t over calculate decisions, they didn’t look at the bigger picture. All they saw was their lives, their short lives and their emotions that clouded their judgment. Dean was a prim example of this, always trying and failing, but he got back up again. That light kept him standing tall, taking the hits that the world swung his way with a smile on his perfect face.

        Maybe the 'profound bond' was due to the similarities between their souls, but Castiel thought it to be something deeper. When he had grabbed Deans shoulder and pulled him from the pit a piece of him was left with Dean, somewhere deep in his soul. This piece had allowed Castiel to understand Dean, to reason with his actions and maybe it was the piece of Dean that made Castiel rebel against all he believed in. It was Dean's light.

        Castiel had always followed his orders, but after living amongst humans for a few months, their humanity began to rub off on him, their light re-lite his.

        Castiel was a creature that had seen the dawn of time, and there was still much for him to learn. Because, although he had lived billions of years, it wasn't truly living. These humans had such short lives, a blink of an eye and you could miss it, and yet they tried to make a difference, to change the world.

        Castiel could see why they were God's favorites. He had only lived with the Winchesters in his life for six years, but those six years he would take over his billions because he had something that was worth dying for: love.

        Those four letters had meant nothing to Castiel before he met the Winchesters, they were just words, but there was a deeper meaning behind them. Those four letters were worth giving up the world, were worth giving up life itself, the most precious gift that God had given every one of his creatures.

        Castiel had tried for years and years now, he had tried to do the best he could, and yet, each and every time he made the situation worse. Sometimes he laid on the grass and reflected on his mistakes. If only he had told dean that Lilith was the 66th seal when he had originally sought to. If he had, Sam wouldn't have raised Lucifer and he would have never released the Leviathans from Purgatory.

        One mistake brought on so much pain, one thing lead to another lead to another. If only Castiel had told Dean about the 66th seal instead of being so cryptic because then Dean would have never taken on the mark of Cain because Abbodon would have never been released. If only, because now Dean was dead, and he had become the very thing he fought in life: a monster.

Castiel laid on the grass thinking; he had finally brought the angels back to heaven and fixed his error, but now the only thing that kept him going was gone: Dean.