ɢɪʀʟs ʟᴏᴠᴇ ɢɪʀʟs

Prolog

This girl.

This girl with short hair and these lovely eyes.

This girl smiles at me from time to time and I wish it would be every day.

This girl is insecure with herself like all these other girls but somehow I want to take her insecurity away.

This girl who holds my hand so gently without a doubt.

This girl drives me crazy with just being her.

But she's just a girl in my friendlist.

A girl with short blonde hair and blue eyes smiling at me without being scared of tomorrow isn't more than a friend.

A girl with much more friends that she adores and comes close to thinks just about me as a friend.

A girl who brightens the day with just her being is just another classmate.

What should I do with a girl like this?

What should I do with myself?

Is it even right to feel like this as a girl?

A girl loving a girl?

Is this legit in 2018? It has to be.

Because it feels damn right.

Yes, appreciating girls, imagining kissing one and having a female crush.

That all feels damn right.

Fuck all these questions about boys.

I dream about my first kiss being with a girl.

My first relationship being with a girl.

I love all these thoughts about being together with a girl, saying I love her and how much I adore everything about her.

I know, sexuality might change a lot when you're a teenager but right now my feels are so strong. So strong that I could describe it as love for...

Love for girls.

Love for homosexuality.

Love for the LGBT+ community.

Love for this girl.

I struggled a lot about finding my sexuality.

I struggled a lot about getting through all this emotional mess.

I thought about being straight, asexual, demisexual, bisexual, pansexual and about being gay.

Right now, I might see myself as bisexual with a strong lean to females.

I say I'm open minded but all I see right now are girls.

No other boy makes me more interested in than this girl.

It's weird. All these feelings, thoughts and imagines are strange.

I never felt like this before.

I never felt like kissing a girl so badly.

I never felt like asking someone out.

All this is new to me.

Sadly, there is no one to help me to get through.

I have to walk through it by myself, with no one by my side.

No one could help me like I can.

This is my journey to discover.

I know it will be hard.

Discovering all these new feelings, all these new experiences.

This will be hard.

This makes me nervous as hell.

I don't know what will happen in the future.

If I'll be able to make my dreams come true.

If everything changes.

Or maybe nothing happens at all.

I'm excited and scared at the same time.

But I just want to tell you:

I love you.

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I usually write in German but I thought why not trying to create a story in the wonderful language called English?

I don't know I'm lately obsessed with this language... and LGBT+ :')

I hope you enjoyed it! I don't know when this will continue and I don't know when my other stories will be updated. But I just was in the mood to start this story. 

So, see ya in the next chapter!