Different Shades Of Normal × Poem

Different Shades Of Normal

This was never originally supposed to be a poem. It was supposed to be an original song but then it just didn't format that way but here it is. It does have a few triggers such as of eating disorders, depression, and a slight touch of two other mental disorders. Feel free to leave if you get triggered by any of those I've said.

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I feel sick
I'm never afraid of the dark
I'm only ever afraid of what's in it.
I feel empty
I'm not in the ocean
I am the ocean.
I never know why,
A reason must exist
But I've never found it.

I want to die, but I don't want
To be the murderer.

I treat my skin like paper.
I treat my skin like a target.
I treat my skin like an enemy,
(When all it does is take care of me).
I treat my skin like it burns.
I treat my skin like it's breakable.

I want to die, but I don't want
To be the cause to the end of my own
Book.

I feel trapped
But I can't scream.
I feel like I'm dying
Yet I can't call for help.
I feel scared
But I can't see what's in the closet.
I feel trapped once again,
I'm the thing in the closet.
I can't get out of it.

"I told you so," Said Binge, taking my food away.

"What's going to happen now?" Asked Anxiety, shaking my shoulders.

"Let's go," Insomnia took me by hand.

"You're not even worth it anymore." Added Depression to the scene.

"Look at you, look at the scale, what is wrong with you? Look !" Yelled Anorexia, who wore oversized hoodies.

"Here you shall stay, and think about what you've done and what you're going to do." Insomnia leaves the room, leaving me to be wide awake in bed. Thoughts and undisturbing thoughts ran through my destructive mind.

I don't hate myself
I just hate what my thoughts say
About me.

I'm on fire,
Light em up,
It's my turn to jump in
And end it once and for all.