Don't look back

Forty seven

"Beth, have you seen Misnon? I wanna show her my drawings." Mary asked the older girl quietly.
"Erm, no. No, I haven't."
"Okay." Mary sighed, then she was cut off by Judith crying. "Can I go get her?" She asked excitedly, and Beth laughed slightly.
"Sure, but let me help. I think she needs a feed." Beth smiled softly. They walked into the other room, and Beth picked Judith out of the crib, then passed her to Mary who was sat down.
"I'll get you one of her bottles, yeah?" Beth nodded, walking away, then coming back with a bottle of baby formula.
"Thank you." Mary smiled, pushing the bottle into Judith's wailing mouth.
"Gentle, gentle," Beth said quickly, adjusting Mary's arms, "you gotta be gentle, and hold it like this, remember?"
"Yeah." Mary nodded, holding the bottle just as Beth had instructed. Slowly she began to look around the room, and a confused look appeared on her face. "Where's Merle gone?"
"I dunno." Beth shrugged. "Your hair looks real pretty. Did Maggie do it?"
"No, Mishy did. Beth, do you think we'll stay here forever and ever? And the Governor won't hurt us?"
"Yeah. I think this is home now, and we can be happy here. And I know your daddy, and he won't let anyone hurt you, or Judith, or Carl."
Mary nodded slowly, digesting the information. "When can Judith talk?" She asked suddenly.
"When she's a bit older."
"What do you think she's thinking about?"
"I bet she's thinking about what a good sister you are." Beth smiled gently, and Mary grinned back at her.
"You girls okay?" Rick asked as he walked into the room.
"Daddy, where's Misnon and Merle and everyone else? Are they outside now?"
"They've gone for a little bit, but they'll... They should be back soon." Rick nodded. "Let's go outside. I need to talk to everyone."
Beth took Judith out of Mary's arms and they walked outside, Mary holding Rick's hand, where Carl, Carol, and Hershel were already sat down. Beth passed Judith over to Carol, and they sat down at the small bench, Mary walking over to Carl and sitting next to him.
A minute later Glenn and Maggie walked over, and Mary ran over to them, holding her hands up so Glenn would pick her up. Glenn did so, Mary facing him with a smile.
"You're happy." Mary grinned, patting his face. Glenn laughed and kissed the child's nose.
"Yes, I am." Glenn smiled back, then he put a finger to his lips and turned to Rick. Mary smiled, then lent her head on Glenn's chest, very hungry and slightly tired.
"When I met with the Governor he offered me a deal." Rick began, his voice shaky. "He said... He said he would leave us alone if I gave him Michonne. And I was going to do that, to keep us safe. Well, I changed my mind, but now Merle took Michonne to fulfil the deal, and Daryl went to stop him, and I don't know if it's too late. I was wrong not to tell you and I'm sorry. What I said last year, that first night after the farm, it can be like that. It can. What we do what we're willing to do, who we are, it's not my call. It can't be. I couldn't sacrifice one of us for the greater good because because we are the greater good. We're the reason we're still here, not me. This is life and death. How you live, how you die, it isn't up to me. I'm not your Governor. We choose to go. We choose to stay. We stick together. We vote. We can stay and we can fight or we can go."
And with that, Rick left, and went up the guard tower.
"Glenny." Mary began, disrupting the silence.
"No, let him have some thinking time." Glenn replied gently, knowing what she was going to ask. Mary nodded, and tried to block everything out as people discussed their options.
"Can we go inside?" Mary asked Glenn shakily, and he nodded, going inside.
"Hey, Mary," Maggie smiled, wanting to give the child something to be happy about, "guess what?"
"What?" Mary mumbled into Glenn's shirt.
"Me and Glenny are going to get married." Maggie smiled. Mary's head shot up and she grinned widely.
"Wow!"
"Yeah! Are you excited?"
"Yeah! Can I be the person who has the flowers and the rings?" Mary asked giddily.
"Looks like we're having a proper wedding." Glenn laughed.
"Tell you what, once all of this is over with the Governor, we'll find our rings, then we'll have a little party, yeah?" Maggie smiled.
"Can there be eggs?" Mary asked.
"If we can find some." Glenn laughed. Mary smiled at him, then her eyes lit up.
"Mishy!" Mary giggled, running over to the woman who was stood next to Rick, walking in. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm okay." Michonne smiled.
"Can I show you my drawings?" Mary asked, grabbing Michonne's hand and dragging her to her cell. "Do you like them?"
"I love them. They're very good." Michonne smiled.
"This is me and you." Mary explained, and Michonne put a gentle hand on Mary's shoulder. "I'm hungry." Mary whined.
"Okay. Let's go ask your dad when we're eating then." Michonne smiled back.
"Daddy. Not dad." Mary whispered, and Michonne laughed. They walked over to Rick, and Mary held up her arms. Rick smiled at her, then picked her up. "When is food? I'm very very hungry."
"Carol and Beth are making something now." Rick smiled, then he gently stroked her cheek with his thumb. "Are you mad at me? About Michonne?"
"No. You made the good choice in the end." Mary nodded seriously.
"Thank you." Rick smiled softly at her, kissing her forehead. "I love you. Lots and lots."
"Love you too." Mary laughed poking Rick's nose. "I'm really hungry."
Rick held her tightly to his chest and rested his chin on the top of his head. He hated that his daughter was so hungry, so hungry she was almost tearful, and he couldn't do anything to stop it.
"Foods ready." Beth smiled, coming over. Rick smiled and kissed the top of Mary's head, but as she sat on his knee eating a few kidney beans and a sardine, he knew she wasn't eating enough, and he hated that she found that normal, and he hated that her body was malnourished, and he hated that she just never stopped being hungry.
"Here, Mary Moo." Rick said gently, giving her half of his sardine, then sliding the other half onto Carl's plate. They were growing children; his, and only his, growing children.
"So," Rick began, "who is in favour of staying to fight?"
To his surprise, almost all of the group raised their hand, including Carl. "Do I get a vote?" Mary asked quietly.
"Yeah. What do you wanna do?" Rick whispered.
"Kick the Governor's ass. Because I'm Big Ass Kicker, Judith is Little Ass Kicker, and Carl is Giant Ass Kicker."
"Alright," Rick nodded, "we know where Daryl and Merle stand anyway, so let's come up with a plan."
"Well we can't just wait for him to turn up then start shooting. We've got the ammo, but they've got the numbers. And we don't know how much ammo. It could be a lot more." Glenn sighed.
"Maybe we make it look like we left." Beth suggested.
"Then hit them while they're not expecting it. Kill all those bastards." A voice said, walking into the room.
"Uncle Daryl." Mary grinned, getting up and running over to him. Then she saw his tear stained face.
"Where's Merle?" Carol asked softly, worry on her face.
"He... He went and took a load of them out. Not at Woodbury, just outside it. W-where we had t-that meeting," Daryl explained, his voice cracking, "and he was shot. Turned but not bitten. They killed him."
"Oh my God." Carol whispered, as Mary hugged his legs.
"They killed him?" Rick asked, his voice gentle yet angry and upset.
"Well it was his dead men. And we don't have any other enemies." Daryl said harshly. "We need to kill them." Then he left, but not before Mary saw the tears in his eyes, and a few strange red circles on his hand and wrist.