It was a normal emo day when parents had accused me of being too edgy for them, so decided to buy some new adults to be my new edgy parents at the local adult store. my old mother once drove me past there on the way to school so I knew where it was. After a long and periless journey I made it. I wandered through the store finding many strange magical items like guides two making children and magic wands. Then I found them, growable parents, I knew they were growable parents because of the naked person on the front (I mean why else wood they be naked) . they where apparently called cone-dams. I edgily waddled up to the counter where a wizard named Charlie appeared . she was using a long black magic wayand. It was shaped like my pee-pee.
"how much be this" I inquired with my best pie-rat accent.
She looked at me and I swear I saw a star glimmer in her left nostril
"that'll be 12 bucks" she moaned in a nasally voice
I handed her the money and rolled outside. The sunlight blinded me when I walk out of that magical store, I now felt...complete. I opened thed box and took out the seed packets. I went back home to my non edgy parents to berry the seeds. I snuck arownd to the back of my house to berry them when my non edgy parents danced out... they where edgy now, but how, I then edgily realised that that majical wizard must have done one of her magic spells and made my parents edgy. I threw away the con-dams and edgily hugged my emo parents my parents edgily kissed creating a tube from butt wholle to bum wholle
Then suddenly there was a flash of light and a large cow with a red lasey bra pogo sticked out of the bush and kissed my edgy dads butthole. Shokethed my dad snapped mum and his own neck.
"Doood, moooom" I yelped but before I could marry the cow he pogo sticked away, And that was the last we saw of him. I dragged my perents into my washing basket and called my best friend me. she stormed in screaming "me, Me" so I punched him and she disappeared into the night. I figured this must have been the work of CHARLE THE WIZARD so I edgly swam to the adult store and jumped threw the door.
"your cow killed my poorants" I splated
She gasped a mighty gasp and yelled "oh no my arch nemesis the cow whisper has returned"
I gasped in confusion" why is he after me and I"
"no hes only after you" she snaled
"Oh no" I screamed and flipped her wig causing a sword to fall out
"use this to kill the cow wisper please" she wisperd in a noice voice.
"ok" I yelled edgily while taking the sword
The sword glimerd in the light of the store I held it above my head and stabbed myself.
"WHY" charle yelled
"I am the cow wisper" I screamed "I have completed your mission for you"
then I died
THE END
