1. I can't but I want to

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Zach

"Jack, wait, I can't keep my balance! Help!" I screamed, the skateboard almost out from underneath me. Without control, I crashed in to Jack. As we both fell to the ground laughing, I found myself on top of him, my hand against his chest.

My eyes widened as I felt his heartbeat fast against my palm, and soon I found myself looking deeply in to his hazel eyes as he did in to mine. Jack had always had beautiful eyes. They complimented his light brown curls that perfectly framed his delicately cut face. My eyes travelled along his lightly tanned skin, yet they trailed down to his smooth pink lips.

In that moment, all I could think about was kissing them, finally getting to learn how they-

"Zaaaaaaaach!!!!"

A shrill squeal sounded out, sending my head to follow it's direction. As my eyes fell upon a person who had so easily escaped my mind in those few fleeting moments, I was forced to close them for a brief moment to gain composure, taking in a deep breath.

It was Madelaine. My girlfriend. I looked back at Jack longingly, brushing a curl off of his perfect face, letting my palm linger on his chest for just a moment longer, and noticing his heartbeat for the last time before knowing I'd have to get up. Can't say I wasn't slightly disappointed...

I pushed myself up off the ground before lightly jogging over to Madelaine. I hugged her, trying to clear my thoughts of the boy on the ground yet I couldn't prevent myself from watching how Jack sat up on the pavement, hand on his skateboard next to him.

As he picks it up and presses it against his chest I can't help but wish I was that skateboard. Madelaine pulls my chin to face her in an attempt to seize my attention, and before I'm aware she has already leaned in to plant a cold peck on my lips. Ew.

I mean, no.. not ew. I'm not gay. I'm not! Especially not for Jack... speaking of Jack, I haven't intensely and slightly-creepily stared at him for a while. I look down but see no Jack. He left..

I frown, but the feeling of Madelaine touching my shoulder brings me out of my thoughts and back into that moment. I turn back to face her and plaster on a fake smile. I take her hand, and as I do, I can't help but think of how I wished it was Jack's hand, and I wished he loved me, but he never will. Never.

-

Jack

"Jack, wait, I can't keep my balance! Help!"

Before I can stop him from falling, Zach has collided in to me and we both stumble on to the pavement. I land on my back, which hurts, but then I notice Zach on top of me. I can't believe it, he's on top of me. On. Top. Of. Me!!

I realise I had been holding my breath and unsteadily released it. His palm was pressed against my chest... I hope he can't feel my heart beat, it's fluttering like crazy. I stare in to his chocolate eyes, wanting nothing more than to have Zach, for us to be together. I trail a hand up the smooth skin of his arm, losing myself in the view. My mind stops working, and before I realise it, I'm leaning in towards his lips, but something grabs my attention.

It's Madelaine. She annoyingly squeals Zach' s name. That's it. That's why we can't be together. Well, also the fact Zach is straight, and will never love me, but I tell myself it's Madelaine's fault to make myself feel better. Hating Madelaine is harder than hating myself, but it works to lessen my self-resentment.

Zach stands up and walks over to Madelaine. All the warmth he had introduced into me seeped out. Upon seeing Madelaine kiss him, my heart felt as if it would give out and never stop sinking. I clutched my skateboard closer to my chest. I knew he couldn't see my heart breaking, but it felt like he could. I couldn't bear to stay and watch, so I got on my skateboard and left.

As I skated home my mind was clouded with thoughts of Zach. Why had life done this to me? Did I deserve to fall in love with someone I can never have? Lips I can never kiss and a hand I can never hold... and-

My thoughts were cut as in the corner of my eye I saw a girl walking in front of me, and it was too late to stop myself from knocking her straight to the ground.

𝐁𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 | 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐲 ✔️Where stories live. Discover now