I know that I am not a good person, never was, never will be.
How do I know that?
Well, everybody has some breaking point where they break and pull themselves together and start fresh, changed.
But my breaking point is long since passed and now I don't feel anything. Just a momentary emotion which vanishes with time (in my case a few days).
Anger, sadness i.e. emotions in all when put to good use can do wonders and there was a time when they were my strength.
But now its nothing, just emptiness.
My support in the outside world (my everything), the one person who wouldn't think twice when things came to me, left me to go to another city and didn't once inform me about her departure.
She was in the most difficult of times and I wasn't there to hold her, console her, because I was lost in my world, ignoring her.
Not once wanting to know about her welfare, and she was always adamant about by well being,keeping me in her prayers, wishes.(no she wasn't my mother, nor sister, friend neither, she was my soulmate)
I broke her.
But, though I didn't acknowledge her presence in my life, she is always there to stop me from doing anything wrong, making me think twice.
Making me think atleast once about my wrong deeds and the effect on her if she comes to know.
But, now I don't have to think about anyone.
You said you will always be here for me..
And I know you will be because you always keep your promise unlike me.
But, it's just that, now I don't want to malice your life more.
You gave me everything, and I only broke your heart.
Don't worry, I know I will come running to you whenever I will need you and you will take me in.
But you won't come to me, and that hurts the most.
Because I made that valley between us.. and now I am falling into it.
And I don't think anyone can save me.
Not even you.
It's not about me. Just some random thoughts, i couldn't keep to myself.
Needed to take them out.
So here they are.
I am not tagging anyone, because these thoughts aren't important, these are just random thoughts.
