together || book 3 of 'she's a dixon'

chapter 5

breakfast time was silent.

i sat next to carl and he was refusing to eat. i looked back at dad and when he made eye contact with me, it was clear concerned about carl also.

"everybody okay?" rick asked coming into the cell block. this came to a shock to all of us. he's been...gone.

"yeah, we are" maggie said. rick started walking closer to us. "what about you?" i asked once he reached the table. "i cleared out the boiler block." rick said looking down at carl.

so that's what he's been doing. he's letting all his anger out by killing walkers.

"how many where there?" dad asked rick. "i don't know. a dozen, two dozen? i have to get back. just wanted to check on carl" rick said patting carl on the back and turning around to return to where he was.

carl immediately became sadder when rick was about to leave. he just needs his dad right now.

"rick, we can handle the bodies. you don't have to" glenn offered getting up from his seat. "no, i do. everyone have a gun and a knife?" rick said quickly walking over to dad. "yeah, we're running low on ammo though" dad said making eye contact with rick who was hovering over him.

glenn informed rick that him and maggie are going on a run later for ammo and formula. and dad explained that axel is currently trying to fix the generator. rick seemed ok with it all and quickly started to walk off. "rick!" i called out trying to stop him. he ignored me and closed the cell gate behind him.

hershel went off to go talk to rick after breakfast. a little bit after, dad, oscar, carl, and i went down to the halls of the prison to check things out.

when making our way down, there was walkers on the other side of a door. we must've missed them. "they ain't goin' nowhere. we'll take care of em on our way back" dad said starting to lead us off.

carl was ahead of us completely zoned out. he was just staring at the ground. dad whistled next to him to get his attention. "come on" he said motioning his head.

"you know my mom, she liked her wine. she liked to smoke in bed. virginia slims. i was playing out with the kids in the neighborhood. i could do that with merle gone. they had bikes, i didn't. we heard sirens getting louder. they jumped on their bikes and ran after it. you know, hoping to see something worth seeing. i ran after them but i couldn't keep up. i ran around a corner and saw my friends looking at me. hell, i saw everybody looking at me. fire trucks everywhere, people from the neighborhood. it was my house they were there for. it was my mom in bed burnt down to nothin. that was the hard part. you know, she was just gone. erased. nothin left of her. people say it was better that way. i don't know. it just made it seem like it wasn't real, ya know?" dad told carl.

i followed close behind listening. dad has never told me this before. he tries to keep his life before i came out of the picture. i've asked him why before. he said he doesn't want me to have the life that he had and he doesn't want to bring any negativity into my life. that's also why right when i was born and my mom left, dad picked up everything and left with me. he didn't want me around the negative part of his life. he moved us to the other side of georgia. away from his dad.

merle was still around, but not often. dad tried to keep him away from me as much as possible.

dad always tried to be a good influence and put other good influences in my life. and i'm extremely grateful for that.

"i shot my mom" carl confessed. my head shot towards him. "she was out. hadn't turned yet. i ended it. it was real." carl said.

that had to have took a hell lot of emotional strength. this is going to change him. we stayed silent after carls confession. that was until carl stared talking again.

"sorry about your mom" carl said looking at the ground and talking to dad. "i'm sorry about yours" dad said once carl looked up again. carl nodded. dad then looked back and me and put a hand on carls shoulder. "come on" he said referring to the both of us.

dad continued to lead as we made our way towards the cells in one of the bottom sections. oscar got all excited about finding a pair of slippers. then out of no where, there was walker snarles right behind dad.

he jumped because it caught him off guard. and right as me moved away from the walker, i shot an arrow right into its left eye ball. "alright" dad said looking at me and nodding. i gave him a small smile.

he leaned down to the walker that was now on the ground. he first took out my arrow and handed it to me then took the knife that was hanging out of its neck. "that's carols knife" dad said looking at it. he used the shirt that the walker was wearing to clean the blood off the knife. he misses carol clearly.

later as we were in the cell block, dad motioned me over to him. "i'll be back a lil later. please stay here, i just need to think about some things" dad said quietly. i nodded and he kissed me on the top of my head and went off.

beth was preparing some food. hershel was holding the baby and carl was just staring down at the table.

rick came into the cell block and immediately went towards hershel. rick looked down at the baby and then hershel handed her over to rick. rick started talking to the baby, then he held it up and smiled. as tears started to run down his cheek, he held the baby closer to his chest. i smiled as he kissed the baby on the top of her head.