In the Woods When First We Met

97. Not With, But To

"Well you don't have to act like I'm some kind of monster over it," Billy said as Jane stared at him.

She just sat there a moment, then she slowly got up off his bed.

Finally she asked, "How...how did you think of..."

"What?" Billy asked, his patience growing thin.

"...doing that?!" Jane finished awkwardly. "...Have you ever done that before?"

"No," he answered honestly.

"Then how did you even know..."

"It's not exactly hard to figure out," Billy said with a laugh.

"But..." She shook her thoughts away. She felt so confused. "I thought you didn't like Anne."

Billy looked startled. "I don't."

"You call her ugly. You call her a dog."

"Yeah," Billy agreed.

"If you find her so unattractive, then why would you want to do that with her?" Jane could not comprehend this. "The first time ever you did that sort of thing, and you wanted it to be with her?"

She sputtered on, "Billy, you...you act like you can't even get too close to her or you'll catch cooties from her or something...but then you turn around and do something that's the very closest you can be to her? You...you had intimate relations with her!"

Billy just stared at her as if she were dumb- as if there was a puzzle with a giant piece missing and that piece was dangling over Jane's head but she hadn't seen it yet. He responded, "Don't you get it? I didn't do it with her. I did it to her."

Jane let that sink in.

The line made her feel shaken to her core, and it would replay itself over and over, endlessly, in her mind, in the all the days and weeks and months to come: I didn't do it with her. I did it to her.

Then a cruel smile crossed his face. "It was the perfect revenge- why not do to her what she accused Prissy of? It served its purpose: it hurt, and she bled."

Jane just stared at him.

Then he laughed. "Gilbert acts like bloody underwear is dangerous to me, like it's proof or something. But she's not gonna show that to anybody; she'd be too embarrassed." He looked sickly proud of himself as he said: "The only thing bloody underwear will do is remind her that she shouldn't mess with me."

Tears sprang to Jane's eyes, but she turned quickly to avoid her brother seeing them. "I don't think you should have done that," she said, her voice hoarse.

"Why not? She won't make that mistake again. Just wait and see if you hear her make one peep about any of us."

"I'm going to bed now." Jane said, quickly heading toward the door.

Billy slept easily, but Jane lay awake for hours.