24. The Words

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'I know that we're both afraid
We both made the same mistakes
An open heart is an open wound to you
And in the wind of a heavy choice
Love has a quiet voice
Still your mind, now I'm yours to choose

And I know
The scariest part is letting go
Let my love be the light that guides you home'

- The Words, Christina Perri.



Alec stood outside the apartment building, still unsure whether he should or not go inside. He was still a little dazed after his dream. Image of Melissa replayed in his mind again. His words still echoed and reminded him of that dream. He couldn't go with Melissa, he couldn't leave Beth alone. She needs me as much as I need her.
He needed her back in his life. He needed her back.

She is where her heart is. He inserted the keys and hoped to find something that would lead to her. The door opened and he ran upstairs, climbing two steps at once. On the seventh floor, he stood panting. The door was in front of him. With a deep breath, he turned the knob and pushed it. But it didn't open. He tried again and failed again. And then it struck him.
The apartment was locked from inside.

She is where her heart is.

Beth was inside.



She could hear the banging on the door as she sat on the floor, with a small glass piece in her hand.

Alec was outside, calling her, asking her to open the door but how could she open the door. Last time she tried, he thrashed her out, last time she saw him he had reminded her of all her wounds and left them open to bleed. So why should she open the door for him? Why should she let him in?

She looked at the glass piece and saw her wrist. She wanted it to be over now.



"Beth, please! Open the door Beth. I know you are in there. Beth?" Alec slammed the door for the fiftieth time. There was no response. "Beth!"

I have lost her. Why is she not opening the door. She won't open the door. After everything I have done, she shouldn't.


"Beth please, please Beth, I am so sorry. Please just open the door." There still wasn't any response.
"I made a mistake and I am so sorry for it. But please open the door." He stood with his head resting against the wooden door.

"Beth please." His legs gave away and slowly he let himself fall on the ground. "Beth I am sorry. I know what I did was wrong. I should have been there for you. I should have stood beside, fought for you and I am sorry I didn't. I didn't because I was afraid. I was afraid of loving someone again. I was afraid of forgetting Melissa and when I heard about the accident, all I thought was about myself. I forgot that there was someone else who lost their everything in that accident. I was selfish Beth, but please just give me one more chance." He wished for a response. He wished for her to let him in. He wished for some sign from her but there was only silence.

"I can understand Beth, I can understand why you don't want to open this door. I know that place where you are standing very well. I used to stand there too and I stood there for long time. But then you came in my life Beth and I forgot about everything. All that mattered was you. But when I heard about Melissa's accident and it was your car that she had hit, my fears came back. The same fears that had engulfed me a long time back. But then you went away, and I realized what I had done. Now you are standing there, in that same darkness and I have pushed you further in and I am so sorry for that. But you need to give me one more try Beth.

"You were there in the light and I know, I felt the same change and that changed that scared you like it scared me. But now I have finally realised, there is nothing to be afraid of. I never thought I could ever let Melissa go, but I don't have to let her go. I will always love her. But the thing is, you both have my heart. I am not afraid of anything now... except.....except losing you Beth. I lost Melissa, but I survived because you came along. But if you leave me now, I won't be able to survive Beth. I won't. I know I won't.

"Beth...." And then he said the words he had never hoped to say, the words he was afraid to speak all this while long. "Beth I am in love with you. I love you Beth, I love you. And it took me so long to say it but I love you." Resting his hand on the door, he hoped to reach her, he hoped his words to reach her. "Please open the door, Beth, please."

Whispering her name he sat there, for maybe few seconds or minutes or an hour or however long it was before he noticed a shadow moving through the slit under the door.



Inside Beth sat, still clutching the glass piece, resting her hand on the door, crying and afraid to do anything. She could hear him whispering her name, she could almost feel his presence inside but her fears were still alive. She could see his shadow through the slit, she could see his hair through the key hole, knowing he was sitting outside waiting for her. But lying behind that door, broken, she wasn't sure if she had enough strength to take another leap of faith. Another one with the same man who left her alone.

She looked at the glass piece again. Closing her eyes, she saw that face again and she knew it was too late.

She had fallen too far.



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Okay, things are getting intense. So what do you think, will Beth open the door?

Write down in comments.

Keep reading for next chapter.

Love,
Alice.

*****

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