Finders, Keepers. BOOK 2 | Scomiche

Chapter 13

     The whole morning felt emotionally overloading and weirdly normal. He woke up next to Scott. They touched and kissed in the shower. They spent all morning with people he loved. It was like everything was back to normal, except he couldn't make his insides feel normal. There was a knot in his stomach. His heart was still aching. His brain was refusing to catch up. He thought he wanted to go back to New York, but the closer they got the more he could feel his anxiety crawling through his veins.

     The hand in his, which had never before failed to comfort him... wasn't. And he couldn't for the life of him figure out why. Mitch wondered if his brain had checked out of this relationship already, even if his heart and consciousness hadn't. Mitch glanced over at Scott in the car. They were headed from the airport to their apartment and Mitch watched the way he was chewing on his bottom lip, and the way his head swiveled with the turn of the car.

     Scott was so handsome. He missed him.

     "Am I safe?" The silence in the car was broken with his question, and Scott's eyes flicked to his for a second.

     "I don't know." Not what he wanted to hear, but at least it was honest. "Right now, yes. I highly doubt anyone knows you are back." Mitch nodded his head even though Scott wasn't looking at him. The thumb on his hand started swiping back and forth. He looked out of the dark window. A familiar road, but he still felt so far away from it.

     Scott pulled into his parking spot not thirty minutes later. He turned the car off, but neither of them moved. Mitch sat still holding his hand and looking out the window. He could see Scott's reflection turn to look at him.

     "Are you ready to go inside?" His voice was barely above a whisper. Mitch closed his eyes.

     He sighed. "Yeah." He let go of his hand and reached for the door handle, but Scott's hand caught his arm. Mitch stopped his movement, but he didn't want to look over at him. He was afraid of his eyes. Scott could read him too well and his emotions and feelings were too mixed up right now. He didn't want Scott reading something that he wasn't in control of just yet. Scott finally let go of his hand and they both moved slowly, grabbing his things and stepping up to the door.

     Mitch looked around as he walked through to the bedroom. Their place looked exactly the same as before. He could have sworn that the water bottle on the table was there even before he left. He heard the door lock and Scott come walking down the hallway. Mitch was feeling antsy and it was frustrating him. He wanted to just relax. Why couldn't he relax?

     Mitch dropped his bags by the door and stood facing the bed, wringing his hands. The light flicked on. He heard Scott shuffle around behind him.

     Then hands touched his shoulders and his lungs pushed his air out of him as his head dropped, making his chin hit his chest.

     "Talk to me Mitchy. Please." Scott's forehead rested on the back of his neck. He could feel his hot breath down the back of his shirt.

     "I-I don't know w-what to say." He cursed the stutter. The anxiety in him was making him start to shake.

     "You asked me to bring you home. I have. Why there is still a battle in you?" The hands on his shoulders slid down to his elbows before resituating around his waist. Scott lifted his head to press his lips where his forehead was laying, right over the small tattoo on the back of his neck.

     Mitch clenched his teeth at the broken sound of his voice. He could feel the burn start in his stomach and fight its way out of him. He gasped when he ran out of air, the sob breaking free. "I don't know. I don't know." His voice was high pitched and broken up. He covered his eyes with his hand, ashamed that he couldn't just be okay.