*Discontinued* Let Me Take Care Of Him || Shameless

Day 4 *Trigger Warning*

(A/N; Play The Video When i Say So I goes to the chapter; Its like all his memories from Mickey and him.)

You know when you get that urge to do something you've never done before, you know it's bad but you just can't help yourself? Well, Ian really wanted to do something and he had that ball of uncertainty in his stomach. He looked at his lover wondering if he should or shouldn't. The pain in his chest had increased. He felt like his breathes were useless, his life was useless.

"Good Bye Mickey..." His voice failed him, as he let out a shaky breathe. "I Love You." He closed his eyes and imagined Mickey's face when he saw his own lifeless body on the floor covered in blood with a bottle of swallowed pills and some random alcoholic drink beside him.

He was going to do what he had to do.

Ian Grabbed a kitchen knife, a bottle of pills that had a warning label on it that read; Do not take with alcohol, blah, blah, blah, Do not take more than 2.  The final item that Ian grabbed was a bottle of cheap vodka, the kind that Mickey loved for some unknown reason. He went to the bathroom and started to fill up the tub.

He looked down at the water as he open the pill bottle, "Good", He whispered to himself. He threw back 1/2 the bottle of pills before he whispered again, "Bye". He took the knife and slid it up his arm, watching the blood pour from his veins and fell into the tub. 

He didn't feel pain, No, the pills and vodka made him feel numb to everything. He felt numb to the aggravating emotions he felt everyone ignored. He felt alone, lost. He had a hard time looking at himself, so he tried to ignore mirrors or even Mickey's eyes. He felt so helpless. He then felt a wave of guilt.

Mickey.

He had been trying so hard to help him. He'd been trying so damn hard. Ian realized, his emotions weren't ignored they were defined. Mickey had payed so much love and attention to him. Ian couldn't die, no, not here not now. The tub had run over with water, Ian was only in his boxer and a black V-neck. He couldn't gather any strength to move, he couldn't even find his own voice. This is all his fault, he was going to die, and he couldn't even say he didn't mean to do it. It was a mistake.

(Play Video now)

Memories.                               

He remembered the past couple years, everything Ian and Mickey went through together.

Together.

Ian started to hyperventilate, He couldn't die, no. What about the white picket fences and bills, with Mickey. Maybe kids one day, with Mickey.  He wanted all that with Mickey.  His ears pounded and then he heard a knock on the door.

"Ian, is that you?" Mickey. Ian smiled, he was going to save him. He started to make words, he sounded like a srangled hose.

"H...He...Hel-Help M-Me...." Ian gasped.  Soon the door was knocked down and some cries of women, gasps of shock were heard. Someone called 9-1-1, but Mickey just held Ian to his chest rocking him back and forth, whispering that he'd be okay.  

That was the day that Ian knew that Mickey loved him unconditionally.

That was also the day Mickey realized that he could never let Ian go.