Two Pieces of a Broken Heart // Demi Lovato // 2

18. Rant

I woke up and the sun was shining brightly through my window. Squinting, I dug my phone out of my bag and saw that it was the next day. And it was one pm. Thinking back, I tried to remember when I had fallen asleep. I didn't know exactly what time it had been, but I knew it had just started getting dark.

I shook my head, clearing my sudden dizziness, reaching out to steady myself on the bed. I was about to head for the shower, when I remembered I had just showered the day before. Before I got kicked out of the hospital.

That's when I noticed how hungry I was so I headed to the kitchen and looked through every cabinet and the fridge and freezer. My mouth made a little o when I saw a frozen pizza. It would take a bit, but I wanted good food. It was worth the wait of twenty to twenty-five minutes.

I started preheating the oven for the pizza while I snacked on some potato chips. With my phone charging next to the microwave, I searched "demi lovato" in my internet browser. My eyes went wide as I saw article after article about how she supposedly overdosed on heroin. None of them had much detail about the event, and they weren't even sure if it was heroin.

Angrily, I closed my browser and put the pizza on a pan to go in the oven. As I waited, I finished the rest of the chips.

~//~//~//~//~//~//~

"Is everything okay?" my mother's voice asked over the phone. I was waiting for my pizza to cool off a little before I cut it and she called me. A rare occurrence these days. It's not like she didn't love me or anything, we had just drifted apart after I moved away.

"I mean no, but it will be," I replied, struggling to hold the phone between my shoulder and ear while holding the pan and cutting the pizza.

"You had an appointment with Allison that you missed. She called me wondering if everything was alright."

"Allison?"

"Dr. Clare," Mom corrected, sounding slightly annoyed.

"Oh yeah. I'm not really on a first name basis like that."

"Maia, I'm serious. She was worried when you didn't show up and you haven't been answering anyone."

"My phone has been dead. And I didn't even see any missed calls or anything when it turned on." This was all true. Ever since Trevor made me drop it in Nashville, it had been messed up and it seemed to only be getting worse. I was worried it wouldn't even turn on after I got it back in Nashville.

"What's going on? You can tell me." Her voice was pleading and I sighed.

"A lot, Mom. Okay? Demi is in the hospital because she overdosed a few nights ago and they won't let me see her. And then yesterday Wilmer came in and he went right to her room while I was kicked out. It's like... It's like the entire world is against me right now. Keeping me from seeing Demi."

Mom made a small noise to let me know she was listening.

"She's been my best friend forever, you know this. She was there for me when Dad..." I stopped there, not wanting to say it even though it was something we had talked a lot about before. "And I love her. So much and they won't let me see her to let her know... I don't even know. To let her know I'm okay. To tell her she'll be okay." I placed the knife down, leaving a spot of pizza sauce on the stovetop that I would have to clean later.

"Oh, Maia, I'm sorry. I didn't know that's what's been going on but-"

"If you say I should see Allison and talk to her about it, I'm not gonna be a happy Maia," I warned. And "happy Maia" is like my family's way of saying "happy camper." It started when I was young and my mom wouldn't let me stay up for an extra hour.

"I know you're not a happy camper about this, but it's bedtime," she told me, my dad standing behind her.

"I'm not a camper. I'm Maia," I replied, with my childish innocence.

Dad laughed and stepped forward. "Listen, honey, we know you're not a happy Maia about this, but it's time for bed. You can stay up a little later this weekend, okay?"

I nodded vigorously, and went to bed.

After that, it just stuck and to be honest, it faded a few months after my dad's suicide. It reminded me too much of him and my mom saw how upset it made me when she said it to try to cheer me up.

Mom, on the phone now, made a choking sound. "Oh gosh. It's been a while since I've heard that one." She sounded like she was about to cry and I could hear a snivel. "But, I mean it. I talked to her and she can see you today but it'll have to be at her house. No charge."

I was silent for a moment. "Okay, okay. Let me eat some real food and I'll call her."

"Okay, sweetie. I love you and give Demi my love when you see her."

"I will. And I love you too. Bye."

I hung up and finished cutting the pizza. Due to being on the phone, it was very uneven, with a few really big pieces and some really small ones. I put two on a plate to start with and went to sit on the couch and watch TV.

The first thing I found was The Good Doctor, a show about an autistic doctor. I left it there, cringing at the surgery scenes, eating more than half the pizza in less than a full episode. When it was over, I gave Dr. Allison Clare a call.

~//~//~//~//~//~//~

The therapy session turned out to just be a phone call, which was fine by me because it meant I got to stay home and not worry about finding her house.

She told me to cooperate with the nurses and doctors, even if I didn't agree with them and their actions. According to her, it would put me in their good graces and maybe help me see Demi sooner.

I also got out all my feelings about Demi's overdose and how I thought she had stopped and was going to get help soon.

Dr. Clare wasn't sure what to say to that, other than how Demi must have either stopped, then relapsed or she never intended to seek treatment in the first place.

We ended the phone call talking about cookies. Of all things. Cookies.

I scoffed, thinking back to what she had said about getting in the nurses good graces. "What? Should I make them cookies and apologize for how I acted?"

Dr. Clare was silent for a moment. I imagined her thoughts consisted of how stupid I was. "Yes, actually. I think that would be a great idea."

"Oh, great. If only I could bake." And I wasn't kidding either. I always burned cookies, but occasionally I made cupcakes that turned out... non-lethal if ingested.