desolation (phan)

eight

He waited until Phil was asleep to get up from their bed. Dan crept out in his sweatshirt and sweatpants, sneaking out the front door successfully.

His eyes searched and locked on a dark figure, nearly blending in with the night around them. Dan smiled to himself, the relief of finally seeing someone he knew after so long washing over him. His feet followed each other, one after another, as he crept towards the figure moving to him.

"I missed you." Dan lets himself say, and the figure came into view. His sister, Delilah. She was slender, with green eyes and brown hair. A mother of two and a husband back home. They had always been close, especially when Dan started breaking once Phil left. But he pushed her away, just like everyone else, and now he was letting her in again.

She starts running to him, their bodies clashing in a tight hug. "I'm so glad you texted me. I've been thinking about you non-stop- the kids always ask how 'Uncle Danny' is."

Dan let his lips curl up at the mention of his nieces, still in disbelief that his beautiful sister was really here. He missed talking to her, even just in general. He would never admit it, but he missed her the most out of everyone he pushed away.

Delilah started to go inside before Dan stopped her. "You can't come inside," he stammers, trying to think of an excuse as to why when she asks. He gives up, and speaks. "I have to tell you something."

She furrowed her eyebrows, clutching her coat closer to herself and shifting her weight. "What is it?" She's worried, Dan can tell, and he already feels bad for being on the verge of putting this burden on her. She didn't have to know. Dan starts to panic, eyes watering before he can stop it.

"I- . . ."

She reached out and pet his shoulder for a second, lips in a tight line. "Please. Please don't shut me out again."

"You can't tell anyone. And this is not some kind of kindergarten secret, it's not. This is to be kept secret for your own safety, mine and yours, okay?"

She let go of his shoulder, cowering into herself as fear filled her from head to toe. "Daniel, what is going on?"

Before he can finally admit it, finally let everything out that he is suffering keeping in, his phone beeps. He pulled out his phone and read the message.

3:32am
If you tell her, I'll hurt her.

Dan gulped. He already knows it's Phil, already knows that he must've bought a burner. Before he can respond, another text is sent.

3:33am
Don't think I won't.

Dan stared at his phone in pure terror before he peeked over his shoulder, noticing the livingroom light inside his home was now on.

Phil was awake.

"I -"

"Is it about Phil?" Delilah asked.

Dan nodded. He hates himself instantly. He's in deep now. She'll know, and he'll tell her. He has to.

"He's here," Dan says, and it feels like it's out of his control at this point. Like a parasite took over his body, and he's simply a puppet on strings, controlled by anxiety. "He's back. He came back awhile ago, and he's been threatening me not to tell anyone but I am so confused. I don't know what to believe."

"Dan, you were diagnosed as a schizophrenic just a few months ago. You can't possibly think. . ." Delilah trailed off, and he knows that her response is not only her trying to reason with him, but reason with herself. "You can't. . ."

"He's been here. That's why I went back to therapy, why all these things are suddenly happening. He's inside! I'll prove it!"

Before she can protest, Dan took her by the wrist and dragged her inside. He paces around the house for a second, first trying to find him. He spotted Phil by the window, back turned to him. Dan crept back to his sister, gesturing her into their bedroom, but when he turns back into the room, he's gone.

The curtain from the window sways in the wind, no sight of Phil.

Delilah makes eye contact with her brother, sympathy glazing over her eyes. She thinks he's crazy. Oh no, she think he's crazy.

"I'm not-" Dan begins, but his throat burns. I'm not crazy, he wants to say.

"Why don't you come home for a bit? Come stay with us? You could be with the girls, they miss you. It could be good for you."

Dan opens his mouth to protest, to try and argue one last time, but he obliges shamefully and finds himself packing his bag. Delilah waits in the livingroom, and Dan can't stop thinking.

Where did he go? Or was Dan's schizophrenia lingering- intensifying?  

He zips up his bag, following his sister into her car and listening to the engine start up. He's driving away, in the car, and he wonders if Phil's going somewhere. If he has somewhere he wants to be.

He wonders if it's really Phil.