Silver Lining (Harry Potter fan fiction)

{25} Anxiety

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So sorry people!!!!

I'm super behind in school right now because I came back from a road trip. which means if I'm behind in school I'm behind in writing. But if this makes you feel better. A couple of weeks ago we had our Tae Kwon Do 20th year anniversary. (The anniversary of the business I've been in Tae Kwon Do for six years) and I went to do a six feet distant flying side kick and I failed and fell on my ass in front of 200 people. Hope I made your day :)

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I was standing at one of the tables in the green houses in Herbology class. I was spacing in and out day  all day. daydreaming couldn't stop thinking about Noah for the past two weeks. I'm really glad he tried to get ahold of me but I'm not sure if I'm ready for him to come back into my life. I thought he was good and gone. When our Mother past away last summer he just disappeared and I haven't heard from him since.

I barely listened to Professor Sprouts demonstration. Noah's Letter is driving me insane. There's this question that keeps going through my head "should I reply?".
Luna is the one that's telling me to respond to the letter. And no I haven't told Harry about all this yet. Harry is also starting to take notice of my anxiety and is very concerned about me.

Our partners for today were by our choice so I obviously partnered up with Harry. We were working with Venomous Tentacula for today and getting the juice out of it. I was so tired from not getting any sleep the previous night that I was falling asleep standing up.
"Amy, can you pass me the spade?" Asked Harry.
"What?" I said shaking my head back to reality.
"Oh sorry. Here you go." I said placing the small shovel in Harry's hand."
"Amy, are you sure your okay?"
"Harry for the last time. you don't need to worry. I just got a bad sleep last night that's all."
Harry sighed and continued to work. "That's the 4th time in a row."

"We have a free block next. Why not go upstairs and take a nap." Harry suggested.
"Harry I have so much homework that I need to work on and-"
"And I can help you with it later."
"Please just get some rest. I'm getting worried about you."
I was going to try and argue my way out of this but then if I keep avoiding stuff I'd feel that he would get suspicious that I'm hiding something in a way.

I took his word and went up to the dormitory during break. But I ended up just laying in bed and used the last thirty minutes of the free block to study. I got up and changed into my Scarlet robes again and grabbed my bag that was on the chair sitting at the desk. I went back downstairs and there was a few people inside the common room.
I politely smiled as I made my way out. And started walking the corridors to Potions. I heard fast footsteps behind me and that person soon had their arm around my shoulder. 

"So how was studying?" Harry smirked knowing that I wouldn't go to sleep that easy.

"I couldn't sleep." I Replied.
"I knew you couldn't. Is there any reason why."
Amy sighed than she shook her head "not really." Telling a lie to Harry which she absolutely hates doing. 

A look of disappointment was on Harry's face. "Amy if there's something you want to talk about. That's what I'm here for." Harry reassured.
I have to say something I thought to myself I nodded. "I'm just not ready to talk about it right now. I'll let you know." Amy said calmely.
"That's all I'm asking.                   "Come here." Said Harry opening his arms for a hug. Amy moved one step closer and hugged Harry for seconds and the hugging turned into hand holding.

*

Later that night
Gabriella, Luna, Cedric and I  were in the great hall for dinner.
I find that when I'm stressed I have a loss of appetite. Harry was sitting at a different table than I was. He was with Hermione and Ron.

 Luna told me that I should eat something. But I declined. The rest of the day has been a little easier to deal with. Now that I know I can trust Harry about all this and have someone else that's there for me and wanting to talk. I think I've made a decision.

"I'm going to reply." I stated.
"W-what really?" Said Gabbie.
"Yes. I mean he's my brother Gabbie. I wouldn't want to fully loose him in my life. I need to reply to him. And soon."
"Okay." Said Gabbie and Luna simultaniasly and Cedric just stayed silent.
"Do you know when your going to reply?" Asked Luna.
I sighed. "Tonight. The sooner the better." "Then if he replies to that." "I'll tell Harry."
I've wanted to tell Harry as soon as I got that letter from Noah. I don't know what was holding me back. I'm trying to tell Harry as soon as I can. But I have to admit. If Harry had a Sibling i didn't know about it. I would want him to tell me. But I can't see him in the same situation as me.
I said goodnight to Gabbie, Luna and Cedric and I walked over to where Harry was sitting and said goodnight to him too. I had such anxiety when walking up to the girls Gryffindor Dormitory. I found a bottle of ink and grabbed a sheet of parchment. I steadily dipped the quill into the ink. I took a deep breath and began writing.

Dear Noah

I'm happy to say that I've gotten your letter. My sincere apologies that I'm replying so late. But I have to say, you caused me a lot of stress the past couple of weeks. I want to accept your apology but I don't know how. But other than that Hogwarts is doing great. We have a new Potions teacher and Snape is now our Defence Against The Dark Arts teacher. But if you ask me. Snapes better in Potions. These past months have been tough without Mom. Especially without you. I miss you big bro.

Let me know how Liz is doing.

~Amy  



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