Cámara Sensual (Completed)

Part Four

I kept holding up the picture as though it were a shield.  And it was a shield - a shield for my eyes.  It kept me for seeing the truth as it advanced toward me.  Even if I couldn't see him, I could envision that confident grin on his face.  My brain was lit up.  Was this really happening?  What was I going to do about it?

"What are you doing here?" I managed to say in my frenzy.  "How do you know where I live?"

"Elena told me, of course," he responded with a chuckle.  "I told her that you left something at my house, and I really needed to give it back to you.  Being your friend, she insisted on doing it herself.  But you can I see why I...convinced her otherwise."

Tears brimmed in my eyes.  But I didn't know if I was afraid for my life, or if I was so overwhelmed by his aura and this sudden reunion that it brought me to tears.

"I didn't know you spoke French, Lexie," he continued on in that low, relaxed voice that seemed almost musical.  "I didn't understand I would you said but you made me hot anyway.  I think French is a beautiful language, don't you?  It sounds so sexy coming out of your mouth.  I almost had to pop one off."

"What are you doing here?" I demanded, steeling myself.  There was no way in hell I would allow him to overwhelm me again.  "I cancelled my lessons with you.  I told her I didn't want to see you ever again."

"Yes, that's what she told me.  But what can I say?  I can be very stubborn sometimes.  And I didn't believe her - or rather, I don't believe you."

His footsteps stop right in front of me, and the air is thick with anticipation.  My hands were balled in a tight fist, ready to fight for my survival.  Just like that, the anger and the rage I gathered for him rushed back in a torrential flood.  How dare he come to my house and disrespect my wishes to be left alone?  Just who did he think he was?

"Ooh, you look like you're about to burst, and sadly, I don't mean that in a good way."  He took the picture from my hands, and I turned my head so our eyes wouldn't meet.  The stubborn woman was out in full force.  "Don't worry, I only printed one of these for you.  I have no desire to share you with anyone else.  I just wanted you to see what I see whenever I look at you."

I stopped myself from heaving.  "You need to leave, Vivian.  Leave, and take your filthy arrogance with you.  Or I'll start screaming and then it'll only be a matter of time before the police arrive and take you away."

"You wouldn't do that."  He sounds absolutely sure of himself.

"Yes, I will."  I wasn't so sure of myself.  "I will make an absolute fuss if I have to, now leave!"

"And here I thought you might have missed me."  I fought to keep my composure when he reached out and ran his fingers through my hair.  Good God...  "I'm not one for religion, but Lord knows I've missed you."

His eyes were firmly on me, burning through the defenses I worked so hard to put up.  Thirty days of resolve began to crack within thirty seconds of being in his presence.  I was in a panic. 

"You need to leave," I repeated firmly.  "You've got three seconds.  Three."

He didn't look convinced.  "Now, Lexie..."

"Two!" I snarled.

"Lexie."

"One!"  I opened my mouth, prepared to let out the loudest shriek that I could muster.  Anything to get him to run away...

Without another word, he lift his finger and pressed it to my lips.  It felt so smooth and cool, like porcelain.  I stared at him in disbelief, stunned by how easily he shushed me. 

"Shh..." he began in a whisper.  "No yelling in the hallway.  Besides, there's no need to get the neighbors involved.  There will be time enough for that later..." His voice trailed.  "...that is, if you give me permission to."

A desire more powerful than hate nearly took over me, overwhelming my sense of self-control.  Once again, I found myself in between getting away and giving in - and the latter assaulted me with everything I had.  I wanted to kiss those fingers as they slid down my lips.  I wanted to guide them into my mouth and wrap my tongue all around them, giving him a taste of what I could be capable off if given the right opportunity.

My body was in a frenzy, and my fear neared its fever pitch.  What was it about this man that made want to give into a sensuality I dared not even considered before I met him?

I had to keep resisting.  I couldn't give it.  I just couldn't.  The uncertainty was terrifying.

"Haven't your heard me calling out to you - or shall I say, my body calling out to yours?"  he whispered in my ear.  Yes...yes, I did.  But I wouldn't tell him.  "I waited and I waited, hoping you'd answer the call.  I really needed you, Lexie.  I just had to have you again. But you had to go and hide, like I was a monster or something."

"You are a monster."

"Is that so?  Am I really that intolerable to you, Lexie?"

I laughed bitterly.  "Are you for real?"

"So, that's a 'yes', then?"

My blood was literally on the first of boiling over.  "Can you blame me for wanting to keep my distance from you?  You forced yourself on me!  You planned it all from the beginning!"

At first, he stared at he wordless, and for a moment, I thought I finally managed to put a chink in his armor.  But then he cupped my cheek, and jerked my head so that our eyes finally locked.  The raw electricity that crackled between us nearly paralyzed me.

"The last time I checked, you can't rape the willing."  The tone he used was low, like the quiet growl of tempted wolf and was all kinds of dangerous.  "And if I remember correctly, not only did you say you wanted me, but you also wanted me to fuck you."

The added emphasis on the word "fuck" nearly turned on the waterworks.  I willed myself to focus on the task at hand - getting him the hell away from me.  Even if he had me seeing red, I knew I couldn't guarantee that I would be able to resist him completely.  I failed miserably before - what would make this time any different?

"I didn't have a choice," I spat out, still refusing to own up to my desire.  "I weren't going to let me go..."

"You never once told me to stop," he pointed out. "Not. Once."

I opened my mouth to spew more of my vitriol when it hit me - hard.  He was right - I didn't tell him to stop.  I might have resisted giving voicing my pleasure, but that's just it - I felt pleasure.  Dark, delicious, and satisfying pleasure.  I enjoyed having sex with him, even if I was determined to never admit it.

"If you really wanted to leave me, you would have," he continued calmly.  "And I'd have allowed it.  I don't get off on forcing a woman to have sex with me.Sex is so much better when both parties want it.  Otherwise, it's just a sick person's way of controlling an otherwise uncontrollable person or situation.  And the last thing I want is to control you."

"Tch - says the man who pinned me to a wall."

"A door, actually."  Ugh, his smugness appalled me.  How the hell is someone so confident like that?  It's uncanny.  "And again, if you insisted, I would have let you go.  But you didn't - and I admit, I was impatient.  I've wanted you since the first day we met, and when I finally had you, I couldn't help myself.  You're very lucky - I almost lost control several times, but I kept myself in check."

"Well, aren't you considerate," I said with a sarcastic grin.

"Ah, there's that sly grin of yours."  His voice dropped to a whisper.  The waterworks threatened to rush forth at any minute.  "I missed that and your smile.  I can't get it out of my head, no matter how hard I try.  I can even get it up for anyone else now because of you.  You might have given in me to me, but it seems you tamed me in the process." 

He took one step forward, and I took one step back, only to feel the wall at my back.  Oh no, not again!  I allowed him to trap me again!  Am I really that stupid?

"I'm not doing this," I warned him.  "I admit it.  That night with you at your apartment was enjoyable - very enjoyable."

A catty grin spread across his face.  "I knew that.  The picture pretty much illustrates it."

"But it can never happen again," I finished forcefully.  I might have sounded determined, but inside, I knew I was weak.  "Ever."

"I beg to differ, Lexie."

"No, I mean it."  I stood my ground, keeping my trembling on the inside.  "I'm not going to let this happen again.  I'm not an eagle, so I don't spread my legs or anything else.  You're right - you seduced me and I allowed myself to be seduced.  But that's where it ends, Vivian.  I know better now - I'm not stupid.  I will never allow it to happen again."

My fists were balled so tight, I could see the whites of my knuckles.  I gathered every ounce of my hatred toward this beautiful man, preparing for my last stand.  I meant it, damn it!  I wasn't going to submit to him or any other man.  I wouldn't allow myself to be vulnerable to that raw sensuality that made me weak in the knees.  This was all a game for him - torment plain and simple.  I had my pride, a pride that took me a long time to restore.  There is no way in hell this young punk would steal it away from me!

It was a stand-off.  Even if only a few inches separated us physically, we stood on different ends of this spectrum of temptation.  He was determined to seduce me, and I was determined to prevent myself from being seduced.  We stood in absolute silence, the ticking of an invisible clock pounding in my head.  With every tick, my mania increased.  With every moment I remained in his presence, my composure got closer and closer to cracking, even though my eyes were level with his, and my face carried a stone-like expression.

And then, he spoke so quietly, "I've frightened you."

Boom - target hit.  "W-What?"

"I said, I've frightened you.  I can see it in your eyes, Lexie.  You look like you're about tear me apart, and not in a good way."  His features softened, and he didn't look nearly as arrogant.  He actually looked concerned.  "I'm beginning to think that I went about all of this the wrong way, after what Elena told me."

My eyes widened.  "What are you talking about?  What the hell did she say about me?"  He kept quiet.  My impatience grated me in every painful way possible. "Spit it out!  What did she say?"

"That you had gone through a rough divorce, and that you pretty much swore off men."

I'll kill her.  "Is that right?"

"You tell me."  He cocked his head from one side to the other, eyes still focused on me.  "I think she's right, though.  And it would explain why you cancelled the lesson all of a sudden."

"I cancelled them because you don't know a damn thing about keeping things professional."

"And you don't know how to lie properly," he snapped back, a dark edge to his tone.  "I see it all now.  I got under your skin and into you pussy, and you couldn't handle it.  So, you ran away."

"No."  I struggled to keep my voice from wavering.  "You don't know what you are talking about..."

"I know exactly what I'm talking about.  You enjoyed being with me -"

"No..."

"And you enjoyed submitting to me.  But doing that contradicted your vow to keep away from men, even ones that could satisfy you more than you could have every dreamed of."

I could stop myself from shivering.  "Shut up."

"You know, I'm not as heartless as you paint me out to be, Lexie."  His voice was soft again, but instead of the sensual edge, it was soothing - maybe even sympathetic.  "Believe it or not, I'm empathize with your situation - I do."

"And what situation is that?" I said, stumbling over my words.

"That your ex-husband cheated on you."  His words were a punch in the stomach.  "I wasn't expecting Elena to reveal that much about you, but when she did, I admit - my heart ached for you.  I can understand now how hard it was for you to admit that you wanted me..."

"Stop, just stop right now."  I was half-demanding, and half-pleading, and I didn't know much longer I could hold back my anger.  "I don't want to hear anymore.  You know nothing about me, Vivian - nothing!  You're just some pompous kid who marked another notch on his wall by sleeping with an older woman.  Bravo to you!"  I mockingly gave him applause.  "You must be so proud of yourself, taming a cougar!"

I braced myself for his reaction, fully expecting anger, even rage.  But he eyes were still gentle, and his voice remained soft. "You talk about me knowing nothing about you.  But if you knew anything about me, you'd know that I see as much more than a cougar - that you don't deserve to be classified by such a tasteless title."

"And if you knew anything about me, you'd know that after all the shit I've been through, after all the time I took to get my act together, I could never be proud of throwing it all away to a conceited, verifiable young man whore!"

I don't know if it was the softness of his voice or the sweetness of his words, or even if it was his gentle expression.  But the dam broke, and venom and vitriol spilled forth in torrential flood of hidden resentment, hurt, pain, and suffering. Everything about me screamed anger - the violent shaking, the shallow panting, and itch in my fingers.  He drew blood, and now, I wanted revenge.  He'd gone too far, and he needed to be punished!

I would hurt him as much as others had hurt me.

But in the blink of an eye, my anger was replaced with deep, almost infinite sadness.  The regret was the worse, heavy on my chest, nearly crushing my lungs.  I covered my mouth as the tears flowed freely from my eyes. 

"That - that was way out of line, wasn't it?"  He remained silent, and I could read his expression at all. It made me feel even worse.  "I'm sorry.  I should go..."

Wordlessly, his arms wrapped around my waist, and he pulled me into his warmth.  I cried out, caught off-guard, and my entire body tensed up. 

"Vivian, what are you..."

"Don't," he warned, a sharp edge to his voice.  My desire to speak was promptly extinguished.  "Don't say anything.  Just close your eyes and listen."

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Author's Note:  Hopefully the next private chapter will be up before midnight tonight PST.  Please give me time to write it.  I've worked hard to build up to tension - and I tend to get really shy writing these scenes ^_^

And thanks to all my new fans and those who have been reading this story!  You guys make me so happy!  THANK YOU!!