Saliva

Acidic

"There is nothing at all in life except what we put there." - Mme. Swetchin

Dr. Alex lips were extremely big today, she must have went ahead with the lip fillers. Logan had been coming to Dr. Alex for three months and every session included a new modification on the doctor's part. Two weeks ago it was platinum blond hair, last week it was cheek fillers, and today it was bee stung lips. Logan could bet that in three more months, she would have a totally new face.

The two had been sitting in silence for the past ten minutes, or rather Logan had been silent and Alex was writing on that notepad, the she carried in every meeting. Logan wondered what she could be writing about, she didn't think her file needed that much information. Her life wasn't exciting at all. And really wasn't her that needed help anyway it was Devin, who went crazy. But considering all that happened in the past eight months she couldn't blame him, being raped by your best friend was probably high on the list of things to make you insane. Except it hadn't stopped there, lawyers got involved, threats were thrown around, and then their house was set on fire.

They had no idea who did it, but the cops were pretty sure that Devin burned the house down. Logan didn't know whether to believe it or not, she would have to talk to Devin first and that was out of the question because Devin had been missing since the fire. He wasn't dead, if he was she would have felt it. Devin was older than her by three years but they had a twin connection.

"You've lost some weight since the last time you were here," Dr. Alex says, sitting her notepad in her lap.

Logan glances at her therapist, wasn't losing weight better than gaining weight. Since she had arrived in Riverside, her mother had nitpicked about her eating habits. She had even taken to make sure Logan drunk a liter of water before every meal, so she wouldn't eat too much.

Alex starts writing again.

"Eight pounds in a week. Do you think that's healthy, " she says in her irritatingly calm voice.

"Have you considered what we talked about last week?"

Logan knew this was going to come up, but she had hoped to avoid it. Last week was spirit week at the school and Logan had chosen to avoid the weekly activities which had her mother speed dialing her therapist, because in her mind Logan was showing antisocial tendencies. This had led to Alex insisting that Logan join her youth therapy group, and that was just not going to happen if she had anything to say about it. Logan was not depressed, crazy, or suicidal. Yeah, her brother was missing, it was kind of sad, but not sad enough for her to waste her Saturdays sharing her feelings with a bunch of strangers.

Logan tilts her head to the side, trying to figure out an acceptable excuse.

"Next week is club week and I think I'll probably join one of them. So I don't really know if I'll have time, but I don't really know yet." She breathes in a rush.

Dr. Alex studies her for a moment, as if she's trying to decide if Logan is telling the truth.

"That's a step in the right direction, isolation isn't a good thing for you right now", she says finally. "You need to be around people, try to branch out more." She begins writing on the pad again. "So let's talk about your week. How are you doing?"

Seated in front of her mother, Logan pokes at her food as her mother prattles on about some horrible client that she was dealing with. Logan only ordered a supersize glass of water and a salad. It had chicken and corn, but no dressing, her mother approved of it. On the left of her, a family of five sat laughing loudly at the youngest child who was trying to eat the cartoon French fry people off the table. They were starting to get on her nerves, Logan had always despised loudness.

"Logan are you listening." Her mother asks.

"Yeah, you were talking about your dumb ass client", Logan shovels her food in her mouth at a maddingly pace. She had been so hungry lately.

Her mother stares at for her moment. For a moment, Logan thinks she might lean across the table and slap her.

"You're not an animal, stop acting like one." She says.

Logan rolls her eyes. Angela Davenport was pretty easygoing but after her beloved son and firstborn ran off, she had gotten nitpicky. For nineteen years, she had channeled all of passion into raising the perfect son, now that he was gone Logan receive the brunt of that passion. Her father wasn't any help either, he was what her grandmother call 'hen-pecked'. A weakling. She was counting the days until she left for college.

"I'm thinking about joining a club next week. It'll look good on college applications." She said wanting to change the subject. Angela perked up, maybe because this was another way to steer Logan into the path she wanted. They had talked a lot about Logan's future. Her mother wanted her to become a lawyer like her. Almost everyone on her mother's side of the family was a lawyer, except her Aunt Faye. Aunt Faye was a paralegal assistant and that was an embarrassment to the family, it was never mentioned until her mother got mad.

Logan had no interest in law or criminals. She had seen how the justice system worked firsthand. She saw how they called Devin a liar, she could never forgive them. Secretly, she had been applying to colleges with strong aerospace programs. Her love flying, space, and aircrafts but her mother thought that was too risky.

"I heard the school has an amazing debate team," her mother says and smiles at her. "You're smart enough, I took debate also, you know."

The bathroom at the Aloe Whisky is deserted. Logan had told her mother she needed to pee before they left. It was lie and she was surprised Angela didn't catch it. Logan hated public restrooms, she'd pee in the woods before putting her bottom anywhere near those herpes infested toilets. But desperate times, called for desperate measures.

She reached into her pocket and pulled out the little travel toothbrush, she'd bought two weeks ago. She had begun to bring it everywhere. Kneeling on the paper towels she spread on the floor, she placed the toothbrush in her mouth and got rid of everything in her stomach.