negan fic;; sex, major age gap, smoking, sexual violence etc.
"sunday, wake up, give me a cigarette
won't you quit your crying? i can't sleep
one minute i'm a little sweetheart
and next minute you are an absolute creep"
- obsessions//marin...
VIII. - stop the world i wanna get off with you : arctic monkeys - "i know that getting you alone isn't easy to do"
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the seconds leading up to five o'clock have been torture. each tick of the clock felt as if it lasted a lifetime.
i've been waiting on this meeting with negan all day, and the time has finally arrived. i brush through my wild hair and rub my eyes before pacing out of my room.
the courtyard is four floors down from mine and the staircase is deathly quiet as i jump from step to step. deep breaths of excitement resonate up the building, bouncing from wall to wall.
i push hard on the large double doors and step into the dusky scene before me. the day's heat is beginning to rest and so is the sun, creating grey and purple skies.
a familiar voice cuts the silence,
"glad you could make it kid"
i swiftly turn to face negan and sigh at the sight of the man in front of me.
"anything for you negan".
i kick myself for how desperately needy that reply comes across, but i catch a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
"so as you know, i requested a meeting with you tonight"
"yes negan" i confirm.
his eyes pierce mine. he's big on eye contact. i don't mind it one bit.
"the reason for it being; i need to know if you're happy here" he doesn't disconnect his eyes, even as mine widen is confusion.
i shuffle nervously. i know my answer already, "yes. i love it here, thank you"
the last rays of the setting sun hit his face and soften his features as we remain face to face. i notice the untidy hairs in his greying beard, and a bead of sweat hanging from a stray strand of black hair.
i'm unsure of my answer now, confident that i am in fact happy here. but whether i've grown attached to the sanctuary for the correct reason is where i lose myself.
he smiles now. unapologetically. "good. that's all".
he reaches an arm out and holds mine. i flinch at the touch. his hand is so cool and i feel goosebumps appear on my skin.
"i'll be seeing you tomorrow billie"
"i'm looking forward to it" i reply, as he releases my arm from his strong grip and turns, walking away and swinging lucille over his shoulder.
"fuck, one more thing doll" he swivels around to face me "those cigarettes, would you like to share another some time?"
"if you're offering" i smile at him before dropping my head to stare at the ground. i don't know how to act around him. i wiggle my right foot and bite my lip. i need to stop feeling this way about negan.
a warmth spreads across my chin and two sturdy black boots have appeared next to my tattered ones. i keep my eyes plastered to the floor. i glimpse lucille rested against his leg. negan is stood so close to me. his hand on my chin, he lifts it so that our eyes meet.
i feel his hot breath hit my lips as he whispers,
"my god. tomorrow better come fucking fast."
i shudder as his words travel right through me. i can only bring myself to nod as a reply.
