Mademoiselle - Les Misérables

Chapter 9 - A Pick-Me-Up

"[Y/N], what happened?"

That was the question that you heard all night.

Apparently, it was more clear than not that something had occurred— and everyone was horribly worried for you... of course, the man and Timeo were the only ones to blame for the entire scenario, but nonetheless, you found every possible way to pin it on yourself... You didn't even know why.

Little Gavroche (who was still getting over his damned cold) tugged on your dress with a frown.

"[Y/N], you's looking a little sad," he said, rubbing his eyes. His sniffle wasn't nearly as bad as it was before, thank goodness, but now it was his puffy eyes that were bothering him. "Anything I can do to help?"

Your gaze snapped up from the table... And of course, you gave the most painful, horrible kind of smile that you've had to give— it almost literally hurt you just to give half of one.

"No— thank you, Gavroche," you said with a small nod.

Grantaire, for the first (and probably one of the only times) you had ever seen him sober (even if not entirely), had been eyeing you pitifully all night, simply holding a bottle of wine and not even taking a sip. He offered it to you once, and politely, you declined... had you not been at the risk for tripping and further injury, you would have grabbed that thing faster than anything in your entire life.

"[Y/N]," someone else said. Speak of the devil, this was the first time you saw Grantaire looking remotely concerned— and the first time that he legitimately thought about what he said. He pursed his lips as he drummed his fingers on the table, and carefully, he spoke again. "Something happened, didn't it?"

You frowned a little.

"It's not a big deal," you said with a shrug.

That was a lie.

The scenario was one of the 'biggest deals' you would deal with in your entire life— but perhaps, if you ignored that it ever happened, then it never did.

Marius was practically glued to you that night just to fend off the questions. He had even sat in Courfeyrac's regular seat (and made him groan and drag a chair over instead).

"Grantaire, she's going to be alright." You internally frowned... You knew that your brother was going to reassure just about everyone else, but when it came to you, he'd be just like them. He would just want you to recall a memory that you'd rather forget.

You swore you'd punch the next person to ask about—

"What's wrong, [Y/N]?"

Poor Bossuet.

Okay, you didn't exactly live up to that promise on purpose— but when you turned around to politely tell him to give you some space, your arm flew up, and you unintentionally elbowed him right in the face.

That was a bloody nose.

"Goodness, Monsieur! I'm so sorry!" you apologized quickly. Bossuet just waved you away with a smile— it was forced, thanks to the fact that he was in a tremendous amount of pain, but he didn't want you to feel bad.

"Don't worry about it, [Y/N]," he said with a smile, holding his hand up to his nose. "It doesn't hurt that bad."

It did.

"You sure?" you asked, and Bossuet just let out a long "pshh."

"Yeah, it's fine," he said as Joly sauntered over. "Joly's helping me out here... And besides. It didn't hurt as bad as when Grantaire hit me with a candelabra— don't ask. It's a long story..."

Grantaire, who would normally laugh, actually blushed with embarrassment... While you didn't know it, he wasn't proud of the man he was when he drank— even though he was all the time. Marius placed his hand on your shoulder as soon as you sat down.

"We have to talk after the meeting," he said. "You can tell me—"

"I think she'd rather not talk about it, Marius."

That was Enjolras... Normally, he'd be preoccupied by trying to continue the meeting (as the schoolboys were always distracted), although he seemed to be a little protective over you at the moment. Everyone took note of that.

"Enjolras... I'm her brother," he said with a frown. His hand fell from your shoulder. "Don't you think I deserve to know what's happened with my sister?"

"Watch your tongue," Enjolras said. "It's her decision as to whether or not she wants to tell... And, because whatever it was has her quite shaken, it's clear that she needs a little space."

You would regularly be offended that someone had spoken on your behalf, but you quickly realized that you were grateful that he had done so.

Marius just looked at you, as if he was pleading with you to say something, but you kept your mouth shut...

Enjolras was right.

You would much rather not talk about this at the moment.

"Thank you," you squeaked. Marius's eyes shifted to the ground for a moment. You felt your heart sink— that was something that he did whenever he felt upset, so almost immediately, you stood up from your seat. "Marius..."

He glanced up at you. The only expression playing on his face was one of complete and utter disappointment, and almost immediately, you felt your heart sink down with guilt. Perhaps it was because you never kept a secret from him, and that was exactly what you were doing at the moment. You could tell how horrible it made him feel just from the way his eyes were— even if dimly-lit by torchlight at the moment, you knew that they were glossed with disappointment... After all, you absolutely knew your brother.

He was the one person who could make you feel better.

"[Y/N], you're staring," Marius frowned childishly, giving a worried glance down at his shirt. "Did I spill something on me?"

For the first time all day, you gave a chuckle.

"No, Marius," you said. Before you could stop yourself, you held out your arms.

You needed a hug more now than ever.

Marius didn't at all hesitate. He wasn't at all a hugger (except with Eponine), so this was quite the rare exception. By God, it was really the best hug you had ever received— he didn't squeeze you to the point where you couldn't breathe, but it was a tight enough hug where you just felt everything slip away for just a quick second.

You felt another tiny pair of arms wrap around your hips.

"Don't cry, [Y/N]," a voice chimed. It was easy to recognize him as Gavroche. Of course, you hadn't realized that you were crying up until he pointed it out— though once he had, you just broke down.

The poor boy nearly had a heart attack... That was, until you gave yet another chuckle, which was soon to be followed by a smile. It was quick to fade away, but of course, both Gavroche and your brother had noticed that it was there...

And that was all that mattered.

A/N: Y'all, this character is frustrating me so much smh— I'm literally just thinking "HUNTIE, IT AIN'T YOUR FAULT— DON'T BE ASHAMED IF SOMEONE WAS AN ASSHOLE TO YOU" while writing about how embarrassed "[Y/N]" is. That's not to say that she isn't going to say something (thank GOD), but for now, it's going to stay in the dark... Anyway, there's more revolutionary stuff coming up (pun intended), and we finally get to meet Gasparde in person. This was a super long author's note, lol... Anyway, love you all, and see you soon!