She

She was Beautiful

"Can you tell me what I did wrong?"

"It's nothing, Arden. Drop it."

"Why are you so angry at me? What could I possibly done to have fallen out of favor with you?" She argued, her feet planted firmly in front of me; preventing me from walking away.

"Leave me alone? Are you capable of that? Stop being so, so-"

"So what, Harry? What am I being?"

"Annoying! Stop burdening me with your friendship! Leave me alone! I like being alone! I was alone when you found me the first time, and I was alone when you found me this time! You just ruin my alone time." I spat. I instantly regretted it as I watched her eyes fill with tears. I wanted to take it back, but I was too angry.

No, I wasn't mad at her. I was mad at my father for leaving. I was mad at my sister for being self absorbed. I was even angry at my mother for being sick and not remembering her own son.

Arden only caught the brunt of it all because she had what I didn't, and I was jealous.

"You don't mean that!" She gasped, a small tear sliding down her cheek.

I don't, you're right.

But those words wouldn't leave my lips, no matter how much I willed them to.

All I really wanted to do was apologize; say I was sorry, kiss her, then move on from this.

But I couldn't. I had my pride on the line, and I was not about to lose it by giving up and admitting that I was wrong.

"I do." I muttered coldly. She let out a breath, along with a few more tears.

Her eyes were so dull. I had taken the light from them, and I knew it. I had stolen her shine and replaced it with pain. I was the only person, friend, she had, and I was announcing to her that she was a nuisance.

Which was entirely untrue.

"No you don't. I know you, Harry Styles. You would never mean something like that. You're the gentleman who set out to show me chivalry wasn't dead. You're a morning person, which I find completely stupid but that's just who you are. You like things to be easy and simple and clear to see. You're completely ordinary in a way that makes you extraordinary in every sense of the word. And You would never say that to me." She fought, wiping the years away quickly, like if she did it fast enough I wouldn't see them.

I still saw them.

"How do you know?" I grumbled. As much as I wanted to stop, I couldn't. I was angry and I needed to get it out.

"Because I see the way you look at me; like I've just put everything into place for you. Like I'm not completely insane. You love me, Library boy. You're just angry, and at what I don't know, but when you get over this I swear to you you're not gonna mean it."

Truth be told, I did love Arden. I loved her love of breakfast foods and her need to keep her room in what she called "organized chaos". I loved ever small thing about Arden, and she knew I did.

My brain, however, saw fit for me to fight the feelings I had. Half of me didn't want to love Arden, for fear of someone else neglecting my love and tossing it away.

My heart though, my heart was already completely in love with her.

Now it was just a matter of which part would win.

"I don't love you. I just felt bad for you."

Her face dropped. I'd finally hit it. The soft spot. I had won the argument, for sure, but I had broken down Arden in a way that I was nearly impossible to fix.

"Don't ever speak to me again."

"O-ok." I stuttered as she stopped off. I reached my arm out, as if to grasp her and hold her close, but she was too far away. I couldn't get to her. I had broken her.

She quickly spun around, to have the last word.

"And here I was about to invite you to spend the summer with my family in America. Myrtle Beach, actually. Screw you! You're the ass, not me." She shouted, making the librarian jump from her seat to usher Arden out the door.

I gulped. I had no thoughts or words or anything really left to fix the way I felt.

I jogged out of the library, searching for my car that was already packed with my things. I got in and started driving toward the one place I knew. Home.

Gemma and Ashton lived there now, but I had to have words with my sister. She helped me ruin things with Arden, now it was time to talk.

So 45 minutes later, when I pulled up, I jumped out of the car angrily, reaching the door at record speed.

Gemma answered the door, laughing at something someone said.

"Harry? I wasn't expecting you."

"You! You ruined me. You ruined the girl I love. Why couldn't you have called?" I shouted, ending up a mess of tears on the floor. Gemma sat down next to me, sighing to herself.

"I'm sorry, I just, I have a life away from our screwed up family. I wasn't ready to face you. You look so much like dad." She said, making honest excuses.

"I told Arden I didn't love her, that I only felt bad for her. I wasn't angry at her. I was angry at you. She was just, there. She was always there. That's why I loved her."

"I'm so sorry, Haz." She whispered, hugging me.

"How am I gonna fix this?" I whimpered.

"I don't know" Gemma murmured, hugging me tightly as we sat on the porch. We sat for a while, so long I can't remember or even try to estimate how long. Ashton never came to check on us, probably assuming it was screwed up family issues he wanted no part of. I didn't blame him.

I kept replaying it all in my head. How Arden left, what she said, what I said. Everything. The tears that ran down her face, they were beautiful. The way she argued, was beautiful.

She was beautiful, and that was something I couldn't deny.