Do you struggle to meet new people and make new friends? Do you find socialising difficult or even terrifying? Do you imagine how life might be different if you were surrounded with friends? Do you wish the world was a friendlier place? If you answe...
The twenty-first-century world is at once a connected and a disconnected place. We may have hundreds or even thousands of digital acquaintances, but many of us lack the deep and lasting relationships that we need to feel as though we are truly living a social life. Most of us are digitally connected in some way or another, but not all of us are well and truly socially connected.
At the root of the issue, is a skills deficit. Social skills can be learned, but they aren't taught. For some, these skills come relatively easy, but others struggle mightily with them. For these, There is virtually no recourse for those who find it extremely difficult to make and keep friends. They leave high school without ever having learned how to engage socially, and this holds them back socially and professionally, sometimes for the duration of their lives.
Enter the Social Way. Socialising expert Sam Lee's first book walks the reader through a simple 8-step program that will help them activate and power up their friendship magnet.
The following is a step-by-step breakdown of the Social Way:
Step 1 – Making a Great First Impression
Getting off on the right foot is the cornerstone of the Social Way. The first chapter covers everything from how to say hello to how and when to say goodbye, from what to wear to how to shake hands. Master the art of the first impression and you'll be well on your way to
Step 2 – Conversing Naturally and Neutrally
Our conversation should flow as naturally as possible, and we should, when we first meet people, at least try to remain in the neutral range of the spectrum. Too often, we pivot quickly to our favourite talking points when meeting new people. When we're focusing on growing our social circles, there are certain topics of conversation (e.g., sex, politics, and religion) that we need to learn to clear of so that they don't dominate every conversation we are in.
Step 3 – Speaking Bodies
By learning how to read body language, we can gain a very clear understanding of our communication partner's level of interest. Friend magnets are often able to do this without even thinking about it, making subtle adjustments based on equally subtle clues and cues from their communication partners. The better we get at this, the better we will get at working a room.
Step 4 – The Intrepid Social Explorer
When we are attempting to grow our social circles, we need to find places where we can meet entirely new people. This means stepping outside of our comfort zone and exploring entirely new social avenues.
Step 5 – Humble Excellence
What you do best is what makes you special in the eyes of the world, and you'll need to find ways to show the world what you can do. Crucially, you'll need to do so in ways that impress people without it looking as though you are showing off. In this chapter, we'll learn how to balance excellence and humility.
Step 6 – Laughter: The Ultimate Social Lubricant
Funny people are socially magnetic, so we need to find ways to use humour to drawn people into our orbit. We can do this with a few jokes—provided we tell them in the right way. In this chapter, we'll practice making people laugh and using this skill to create a circle of smiling and laughing faces.
Step 7 – Bridging: Turning Acquaintances into Friends
At the centre of your social circle are your close friends, and we need to learn how to move people from the edge to the centre, turning the people we want in our lives from acquaintances into friends and from friends into good and even best friends. This is where we begin the deeper work of the Social Way, moving beyond meeting new people and towards building deep, lasting, and rewarding friendships.
Step 8 – Boundaries and Bottom Lines
Friendships have their ups and downs, sometimes requiring a little work and sometimes a lot. This chapter shows you how to put the necessary work in, making sure that this work is balanced between you and your friends (new and old). The bottom line is that the Social Way should enrich your life and the lives of your friends. Focus on quantity over quality and it can never do this. Be a quality friend and expect your friends to treat you well and respect your boundaries and the Social Way absolutely can do this.
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Chapter 1 coming soon.... follow and stay tuned :)
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