Hold Me (Ereri fanfic / Ereri)

First Day Back

Edit to old readers; nothing new! Just rewrote this for the better and made things more dramatic and fixed a load of plot holes, enjoy the new and improved version :)

Eren was the eldest boy at the orphanage at 16 years old, and not once had anybody taken a fancy to try and adopting him. Being the eldest, he helped Sarah, the actual caretaker, run the place. Barely any children were above 14, but those who were were always respected by the younger ones.

Only problem, was that whenever Eren needed somebody to talk to, there was nobody there to listen. They couldn't. Sarah was always busy being this mother figure to everybody else, and with little children not exactly known for being great therapists, Eren was left to let his thoughts wallow in his head, and stare at all the scars he and school bullies had inflicted on his body. What sucked most was that the bullies were in fact younger than him, but since the incident Eren had lost any need to care about much at all. Confused, he'd had run ins with the law a few times which only helped the deterioration of his confidence and self esteem, so now not much but a few grains remained.

"Ereeeeeen! Wake uuuuup!" A young boy cried. "School soon! Get up you lump!" It was Jean, who just turned ten the other day.

When Jean started whining, Eren copied him in a louder voice until Jean gave up. "Give me a minute to get dressed, alright? I'll meet you downstairs for breakfast." He was basically Eren's living alarm clock.

"Okay!" Jean leapt off the bed, and ran out the room.

Being the eldest did have its perks though; Eren got his own room. Most of the time nobody came in, except Jean in the mornings, but if he needed to then he could lock the door.

After getting dressed, Eren sat on his bed with a small box in hand. Inside was a small cloth that probably needed washing, disinfectant, and a small knife that was getting a little blunt. Eren never wore short sleeves to school, even in summer, because he was too ashamed of what he did. To his knowledge nobody knew about what he did, he was quite good at hiding it, but he was growing tired of the sweaty summer days but he didn't know how he could stop himself. It was just a habit now, like twiddling a bit of hair or biting the nails; he just couldn't quit.

Tugging up his sleeve, he searched for a clean area on his forearm. He'd been cutting since was last released from an overnight stay in prison three years ago as a way to help with the emotional pain instead of going out and stealing. Gently placing the knife along his arm, he pressed down and quickly cut a shallow line, repeating the action once more just below it. At this point he didn't flinch anymore, he didn't get satisfaction from the pain, but from seeing the beads of blood on his arm, knowing he was paying for whatever he did wrong as a child. By now the scars were probably going to be permanent.

After wiping clean once the blood dried, Eren fed the children, fed himself, calm a few babies, and then head out to school with a trail of six small children behind him. The few other teenagers were ahead, not bothering to help him walk them to school. It was barely half a mile to their local primary school, and the senior was attached via a swimming pool. 6th form, where Eren was, however, was on the top floor of the building.

For once he didn't get a snide comment as he walked through the school since the corridors were relatively empty. At least until he reached the stairs where his bullies usually hung out; whether it was because they waited for him or another, Eren didn't know nor did he care to ask. "Got any new bruises lately?" One asked with a snicker.

"Can make one if you want?" Another offered, making the rest of them laugh, but Eren ignored them and continued up the stairs.

The main school bully was Annie, who welcomed him with a punch to the gut almost as soon as he entered the common room. "Happy Tuesday." Eren grunted at the dull ache he now had, but he was used to this.

Registration was in five minutes, so he was forced to hang around until the teacher appeared to call everyone. He barely knew half the people in the room because they were the year above, a few of which used to call him names but recently quit to focus on their studies, or they got bored. Eren was grateful either way.

Today his attention went to the pool table, the main attraction in the room. Connie from his year was losing badly to someone he didn't recognise. Maybe he was the year above? It was still early in the year, so maybe he joined this year. Whoever he was, he was steaming hot.

Eren had been gay for as long as he could remember, but that was something he kept quiet from the bullies. The less they knew the better. It meant he tried to fit in as best he could, as much as an insecure, lonely, cutting teen could.

This older boy was short, with raven black hair, green-grey eyes, and his face was flat as a plank of wood. Despite winning by a mile at the moment, there wasn't a hint of joy, or any emotion really, on this guy's face.

He must have felt him watching because he looked up and saw Eren staring, giving him a slight twitch of the lips that could just about be called a smirk. Eren blushed and turned away, now sitting in a quiet corner of the room; not on any seat or cushion, he'd probably just get pushed off them anyway. Despite it, the older boy was still watching him. "Levi! Kettle's broken!" A female voice called from the kitchen.

They sighed and did one more shot, winning his pool game in one clean hit. Everyone was cheering but Eren didn't really listen. Levi... So that was his name. "Morning, runt." Connie greeted, towering above him because Eren was on the floor. "Decided on a date with death, yet?"

"Well you see, every time I leave school I don't see you. Things are going great!" At least he still had sarcasm.

Connie growled at his response and gave him a kick in the ribs, making Eren wheeze. "Annie, get over here!" He called.

"I'm surprised. Too weak to do anything yourself so you brought in back up?" Connie was all talk and no bite, but like Annie, he had reinforcement that Eren should probably fear considering his sarcasm was only making the situation worse.

"The fuck you say to me?" Connie kicked him again. "Learn your god damn lesson!"

Eren lifted his arms in defence to try and avoid the incoming beatings, curling up into a small ball and covering his head. Since teachers never showed their faces except when looking for skiving students, announcements, or registration, Connie and crew had free reign of what they wanted to do to Eren 90% of the time because they knew he wouldn't tell anyone about what they did. "The hell do you think you're doing?" A deep voice asked, one Eren didn't recognise. "What did the brat do to deserve that kind of treatment?"

They stopped. "Oh, it's just you, Levi." Levi!? "Well he's a weak orphan with dead parents and no life ahead of him. It's pathetic!"

"So he's just different?" No answer. "Fuck off, before I hit you myself. Leave him to me to deal with." Eren tensed up as he was now alone with the hot, gorgeous, handsome, sex man that was Levi, whose voice could scare his bullies or comfort sad kittens.

Eren made no resistance when Levi grabbed his shirt by the collar and half dragged him away through an open door and down a few stairs into their group study room. "You feeling alright?" There was that voice. Soft as silk. Eren wanted to respond, but the kicks to the ribs meant only a wheeze came out. "What? Cat got your tongue?"

They stayed there for a few minutes, with Levi leaning against a table and looking at him, and Eren rubbed his chest while looking at the clock. "I'm fine." This was normal to him, and 'fine' was feeling sore in the chest.

"I can tell you're not fine. Bit of an idiot if I said otherwise."

"Well it's nothing I'm not used to." Eren tugged at his sleeves, a nervous habit he'd developed.

Levi sighed and looked up at the clock too. "Look, I've got two lessons up until lunchtime and I don't know when you're free, but you better come here at 1pm sharp or I'll let those guys get to you again. Alright?" Eren nodded and sneaked a peek up at Levi before he left.

When he was certain he knew Connie and others would have gone to their lessons, Eren got up too and went to his first class, Physics, a subject he enjoyed. Maybe it would cheer him up, for once. Levi was certainly a brighten to the day, even if he was quite cryptic about whose side he was on. Just what exactly was he up to?