Forget Me Not

How It Always Should Be

It's getting cold now that autumn finally over. It's not even December yet, but the air already pretty frigid.

It's a sunny clear day, only little cloud hang above. Birds singing in the morning, and an aroma of a cup of tea accompany me as I lean toward the windows.

It's a beautiful day, a nice weekend for a date. A day that I await for five days ever since he gave me the offer.

"Wanna go for a date this weekend?"

Lighthearted and easygoing as ever, he said that like it's nothing, with that cherry smile that taste just like the sun.

Hehe, I'm getting excited. My heart bump in steady rhythm as my foot sway up and down. Without I realize it, a blush and smile streak on my face. This is not our first date for sure, and we've been together for long, but each days seemingly like a new experience for me. There's never once boredom, only silly banter as we nag each other. From the elementary to the high school, our journey have always been sprinkled with colorful spark of youth. Cry and laughter, there was never regret that we're bound to each other.

Perhaps it's fate? Ahh that sounds cheesy, this is not a television drama. Although everyone do commented that our relationship seems like what comes straight of a novel, a bittersweet teen fic with lots of rough patches, but all the quarrel and arguments are spice to our life. We accept each other the way we are, no pretending and lies. The ugly and the pretty, there's nothing to hide. We jest over ridiculous shenanigan, a playful and casual friendship.... until we ended up somehow.... well, figure out that we liked each other.... and well, we're fine with it, so it just happen.

Seriously though, he tried proposing with rose and poems, but he failed so bad, we ended up giggled the whole thing before we do what we do best: screw it, no formalities needed. We ended up just chasing each other because I makes fun of his half-assed suck-ass poem, and like a salty nugget that he always been, he flail his arm. That was autumn last year, which ended as we roll down the dirty dried stash of reddish brown leaves, then of course, we laugh at each other.

Our life has always so casual, too casual for classy date. We always been boys, and boys just being boys, hanging out and having fun just like boys, that is until we realize that we liked each other. We become easily flustered, like when we touched hands unintentionally. I often glance aside and take a peek on his blushed face. Oh god, he always SO adorable when he do that! Seriously, he ended up stuttering and pouting sometimes. Coming from an outgoing, sporty and extroverted boy like him, seeing him suddenly getting all flushed is a delight.

Weird.... I didn't expect that he'll like me this way. I do always been liking him, all the way back since the elementary age, for more than seven years, I had crush on him. Yet I never gave a hint or to open myself because I don't want him to be uncomfortable. We're both boys, after all. I mean, as feminine as I am, and even if people consider me to be a "femboy" based on the look, I don't think he need to treat me like a girl. If my love was meant to be one-sided, then it shall be. All that I want is to stay with him.

....But fate said the otherwise....

I exhaled, a soft smile adorned my face as I rub the golden ring that rest on my ring finger. It may be only a simple, cheap accessory, but for me, I treasure it more than anything else that I ever had. The promise ring that he given at that Christmas night last year, the sweet amber of that cold snowy night that still warms my heart even today. For every moments, every scene, that date is still vivid in my memory, forever engraved as my most precious day in my whole life.

It's December 25th on the central park, the snow is thick, but the weather is calm, with cold wind, but still quite gentle and not as bad as we thought. We're wearing sweaters, fluffy coat, mittens and alike, until we took down our gloves and told me to close my eyes.