Nonsense ... And Sense

Some Funny Poems

There once was a man from Peru.
Who dreamed he was eating his shoe.
He woke up at night.
With a terrible fright.
To find out his dream had come true!

Our school trip was a special occasion.
But we never reached our destination.
Instead of the zoo.
I was locked in the loo.
of the toilet at the service station!

An elderly man called Keith.
Mislaid his set of false teeth.
They'd been laid on a chair.
He'd forgot they were there.
Sat down, and was bitten beneath.

When I'm old and mankey.
I'll never use a hanky.
I'll wee on plants.
and soil my pants!

All doggies go to heaven - or so I've been told.
They run and play along the streets of Gold.
Why is heaven such a doggie-delight?
Why, because there's not a single cat in sight!

That's not my age; it's just not true.
My heart is young; the time just flew.
I'm staring at this strange old face,
And someone else is in my place!

I am a dog.
And you are a flower.
I lift my leg up.
And give you a shower!

I eat my peas with honey.
I've done it all my life.
It makes the peas taste funny.
But it keeps them on the knife!

She fell into the bathtub.
she fell into the sink.
she fell into the raspberry jam.
and came out pink!

Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
God made me pretty.
What happened to you!

There was a young lady of Kent.
Whose nose was most awfully bent.
She followed her nose,
One day, I suppose,
And no one knows which way she went.

If I were a furry bear.
And had a furry tummy.
I'd climb into a honey jar
And make my tummy yummy!

There once was a child in Spain.
Who loved to play in the rain.
One day he tripped.
And broke his hip.
Now he is in serious pain.

Last night at dinner we had some fish,
and though I tried, I did not finish.
My mother told me while I chewed,
brains loved fish over all other food.
She avoided my eye contact,
and tickled my work in green.
But she knew that her body smells,
were foul and quite obscene.

My dog is quite hip.
Except when he takes a dip.
He looks like a fool,
when he jumps in the pool,
and reminds me of a sinking ship.

That's it for this one hope ya like it 😅🤗