Becoming Mrs Jones: My un-Valentine Love Story

CHAPTER 3: ONE TIME THING

Aurelie
"Do you feel alone
And all by yourself
Or do you need something more
Do you feel alone
And all by yourself
Or do you need something more
Than this..." I softly sing along to Selah Sue's Summertime that's playing from my phone as I stand bent against the glass shower door so the hot shower spray can warm the backside of my body without wetting my hair. The heat against my body and the humidity that fills my lungs helps to relieve the wound up internal and external tension. The song's lyrics hit home for me and I want more than this, than to be miserable because of a man's callous care for my feelings, than to feel emotionally raw because a man felt his ego's entitlement to being stroked by a woman was more important than my right to safety and dignity. I want more than this moment. I want to feel like me again. I want my power back.

Thinking about power my mind wanders off to the golden haired angel who saved me tonight, Axel. Axel is good and that's a power he wields beautifully. Thinking of the gentle authority with which he deals with difficult situations makes me respect him not as a man but as a conscious being. I don't respect him because he saved me but because he makes me feel like me and I really need that right now. I need to look into his hazel-green eyes and see the caring, kind and admirational way he regards me. I need to hear his deep gravely chuckle filled with jolly amusement at my banter. I need to feel the secure and comforting encirclement of his strong toned arms around my body. I need Axel. You might think it's weak to seek comfort from the pain of one man in another man's arms but this is a one time thing. I've had a really shit day and I won't deny myself the comfort I need now. I need Axel. Now.

"After tomorrow I'll never see him again," assure myself as my resolve solidifies and I turn the water off so I can got get what my entire being needs. I wrap myself in a fluffy white towel that's hanging on the rail just outside the shower and head to the basin counter where Axel's cosmetics are. I find all but a big tub of Vaseline are heavily male scented so I choose to go old school and just moisturise with the famous petroleum jelly. I put some of his roll-on on just to be safe before walking out into his bedroom and getting under the covers in just the skimpy towel to await his arrival. I lay there for what feels like an eternity for Axel to come check on me and I begin to doubt my nerve to seduce him.

"Aurelie are you decent for me to come up?" Axel calls up breaking me out my internal debate.

"Y-yes. Yes I am! You can come." I call out loud enough for him to hear and my stomach becomes abuzz with fluttering butterflies with the sound of his approaching footsteps.

"You look comfy." He smirks at he as he steps into the room and begins approaching the bed where I lay and taking a seat on the edge beside me.

"I am. You have good taste in bedding, or your girlfriend does." I casually probe his relationship status with a shrug. I'm not planning on seeing him again but I don't play with other women's men, I know how painful that is so I won't cross that line no matter how emotionally vulnerable I am.

"Hahaha it's all me angel. There's no plus one in the picture, hasn't been for a while," Axel gives me an intense look which would make me jump to 'he's so into me' conclusions under normal circumstances but right now it just lets me know that I can get into his pants.

"Your mother must be so proud. I bet you got your good taste from her."

"I sure did," He licks his full pink lips in a heat inducing way that makes me want to lick them for myself and confirm if they taste as good as they look. "Anyway goodnight angel. Sleep well." Axel leans in to place a sweet kiss on my forehead and his proximity engulfs me in his woodsy manly scent that ignites the bravery I need to make the first move. It's now or never, I egg myself on to wrap my arms around him before he pulls away and I tongue kiss his exposed neck causing him to moan deeply. "Damn Aurelie, what are you doing?" He reluctantly pulls away so we're face-to-face, our lips a small movement apart from a kiss.