Reborn

Chapter nine

Nothing really helped. None of the potions worked. The silent brothers did different experiments with him. Some of the potions made Jace sick. He was terrified- what if the silent brothers can't help him? He will be a mundane... Alec was always right besides him. He could talk to him about everything. "What are you afraid of?", Alec asked him once. Usually, Jace would say that he isn't afraid of anything, but that was not true. Deep inside him, he was made out of thin glass, which could shatter easily. He was vulnerable. At least, some parts of him were. Not everyone got to see those parts of Jace- but Alec was one of them. "Of loosing my purpose.", he answered, "Of loosing who I am." His eyes filled with tears. Shadowhunting meant everything to him and everyone knew that. It was his purpose, his hobby, his passion, his life. He couldn't imagine being a mundane. No fight training. No runes. No seraph blades. No ancient traditions. No downworlders. No adrenaline. No demons. He could loose everything his life was based on. He'd rather die. Alec put his hand on Jace's shoulder. He knew how he felt. And he felt sorry for him. Then a silent brother entered the room. Jace was taken away again. They wanted to see how he reacts if he heard Clary's name. To Jace, it felt like they were just torturing him, but he knew, he has to get through this. It was his only chance to cure himself. After some hours he returned- sweating and shaking. Alec grabbed him by his shoulders and made him sit down. "You are still here?", Jace asked. Alec nodded. "But, haven't you had an appointment with Magnus. You planned to go on a date, didn't you?" "I cancelled it.", Alec said. "Why?", Jace asked. He remembered how happy Alec was telling him he went to see Magnus again. It made Jace happy too. At least the Alec- part of his body was. "It just seemed wrong to me... Me having fun while you're down here.", Alec explained himself. "At what time did you plan to meet?", Jace asked. "Eight pm.", Alec answered. Jace looked at his watch. "You can still do that.", he said, "Come on, I'm alright. Go have fun with Magnus." "At least one of us will be happy then...", he thought. "You think I should?", Alec asked. Jace nodded. "Okay, then... See you tomorrow?", Alec said and left.

"Oh! I didn't expect to see you today, honey.", Magnus said as Alec entered his apartment. Magnus redecorated it, which meant he was bored. Now all the walls were colored in different shades of blue, all the furniture was blue, black or gold. Alec liked it- The hot pink walls never really did it for him, especially not with white and silver furniture. "You redecorated, I see.", he said. "I'm feeling a little blue at the moment.", Magnus said, playing with one of the necklaces he wore. Alec loved Magnus talking in metaphors, although this one was kind of low. He went next to Magnus and kissed him on his cheek. "Why are you doing that to me, Alexander?", Magnus asked. Surprised, Alec stopped. He looked at Magnus:" What do you mean?", he asked. "I mean, acting as if you care about me. You are always down there with Jace and if you get home you are so exhausted and tired that you don't even talk to me." Alec's eyebrows shut up in surprise:" Do you really think that of me?", he said, "Jace is my brother, my Parabatai, if he feels bad, I feel bad too, and there's nothing I can do about that. Not a single thing. He is going through the hardest time of his life right now, which needs to be really hard, considering his childhood. He is so close to get his runes taken away. Wouldn't you want to have a friend which goes through that time with you? Imagine losing all your magic! How would you feel?", Alec was getting angrier. There was silence for a moment. "I wouldn't want my friend to be with me all that time. Your life needs to move on, too! I wouldn't want my friend to spend all the time with me, although there was so much stuff that my friend could do! Jace is selfish. And you're not seeing that." Alec's jaw tightened as he interrupted Magnus:" Stop it! Don't talk about Jace like that. I's not his fault. I want to be next to him. And that doesn't mean I don't want to be next to you! You know who send me here? Jace, exactly. He told me I should go see you because he knew I wanted to. He just came back from another test, sweating, shaking, sick, but you know what he said? I should leave, meet you. And this is how you thanked him."

Alec went back to the institute. He didn't want to see Magnus and he knew, Isabelle was worried about him too. So, he decided to spend some time with his sister. "Alec!", she laughed and hugged him. It reminded him of when they were little children and Alec and Jace went to their first missions. Isabelle always used to wait for her brothers to come home. "You are home.", she said. Alec wanted to check the computer in the office as a fire message appeared- It was from the silent brothers. He read the message. Then, it was as someone stabbed him in his heart- "We are sorry, but there's no healing for Jace Herondales mental disorder. He will be sent beck to the institute now."