You, You, You

NOT YOUR AVERAGE GIRL

Suddenly there came a knock on the dressing room door.  Eddie didn’t break his concentration from me, or even flinch.
                “Yeah?” he said calmly, knowing it was his bandmates wanting to get into the room.
                “Yeah, heyyy, Casanova and Casanov-ette, is it safe for us to enter your love nest?” joked one voice.
                “Ed, my smokes are trapped in there with you guys and I’m kinda dyin’…” said another voice.  Eddie smiled jovially and held my hands. 
                “You’re still planning on sticking around, right?” he murmured, eyebrows raised in the hope that this wasn’t all just a dream.
                “Of course,” I whispered to him.  Eddie leaned in for one last soft, lingering kiss, then led me to the door where he opened it for the guys.  I heard someone wolf whistle as I came around to stand near the open doorway.
                “Shut the fuck up, asshole.  Hi, Izzy, right?” a smiling and sweaty Jeff Ament asked me, after kindly defending my honor towards whoever just whistled.  I nodded and offered my hand for him to shake.  I couldn’t manage to get any words to come out—I was about to meet the other members of Pearl Jam!  This was too incredible and I think my system was trying to play catch up.  “Hi, I’m Jeff.  You’re pretty ballsy up on that stage, I really enjoyed it.  And I enjoyed seeing another singer give Ed here a run for his money,” he added with a wink and a mischievous glance at Eddie.  
                “Jealousy is a powerful thing, man.  And so are my arms,” Eddie joked, grabbing Jeff and practically throwing him onto the dressing room couch.  I chuckled and turned back towards the doorway.  Stone Gossard approached me, also snickering and holding out his hand.
                “Stone.  Nice to meet you, Izzy,” he said, shaking my hand and coming in closer to give me a little hug with his other arm.  He was careful not to linger too long, but he whispered something in my ear before pulling away.  “Honor to play on the same stage tonight.”  I smiled in gratitude at the kindness Stone was nice enough to extend.  These guys are really the opposite of assholes, I marveled to myself.
                “Thank you,” I whispered back.  “Hey, the honor’s mine.”  Next, Mike McCready, with his guitar still strapped to his back, walked towards me. 
                “Madame, I’m Mike,” he said, taking my hand.  
                “Izzy.  Glad to meet you,” I replied.  Mike winked and headed toward a side table to grab his smokes, then plopped down on the couch and started noodling around on his guitar.  Could this be my life?  Was I really just standing there, meeting some of my favorite musicians in their own dressing room, after having the opportunity to share a moment with them on stage?!  And then there was Eddie.  He had come completely out of left field, and I let myself be carried away.  I knew I should try to tone down my impulses for the sake of being a functional, responsible adult—I didn’t really know this man after all.  It just felt so natural and true, I couldn’t act any other way!  I still had a gigantic, toothy smile plastered on my face, and it wasn’t going anywhere for the foreseeable future.  I looked over to Eddie, who was still joking around with Jeff by the couch, and he stopped for a moment to look in my direction.  In that split second, his face was beaming—it wasn’t dark and full of obvious angst like it so often seemed on stage.  Actual light seemed to radiate off of his skin as he blinked his eyes slowly and smiled kindly at me.  I could see that he was beyond happy to watch me meet his friends.
                Suddenly my reverie was interrupted by the loud crack and sharp sting of my behind being full-on smacked.  Instinctively, I spun around to face whatever son of a bitch dared to do that to me.  I was not one to be disrespected by anybody without standing up for myself… loudly.
                “WHAT THE FUCK,” I yelled when I finished turning and saw an obviously drunk Dave Abbruzzese walking behind me.  I didn’t hesitate to confront him just because he was a member of Pearl Jam.  Dave reached into a small refrigerator and grabbed another beer, smirking to himself.
               “Hey, you smug prick, I’m talking to you,” I shouted and smacked the full beer bottle right out of Dave’s hands, spilling it all over his shoes.  This was how it was when I got angry—my temper had become infamous around the venues in Detroit, but I only used it when it was fully warranted.
                “Whoa, settle down pussy cat, okay?  Chill,” he spat.  That was it.  When I see red, I see red, and there was nothing anyone could do to stop me.  I lunged at Dave and punched him, harder than most people assumed my petite body was capable of, square in the nuts.  He immediately doubled over, turning sideways to lean up against the wall for support.  It didn’t seem like he could quite breathe yet.
                “Touch me or call me anything other than Ms. Starnik again, you son of a bitch, and I will rip them off.  Got me?”  I gave Dave a small shove, sending his already struggling-to-stand body to the floor in a heap.  I turned back around, breathing hard and proud of myself for not punching Dave in the face.  Then I saw the other guys standing frozen in their places, staring at the scene in disbelief.
                Jeff was slowly beginning to crack a smile, unable to contain himself.  He started slow-clapping as Mike stood still with his hand covering his mouth, eyes as wide as silver dollars, and Stone stared on with a look of genuine but fearful admiration.  Eddie was the only one who looked angry, like he was bothered that I didn’tpunch Dave in the face.  Believe me, I wanted to.  It looked like Eddie wanted to do it himself. 
                “You… go… Izzy!  That was fucking amazing!” Jeff exclaimed, breaking into a hearty laugh.  He continued clapping for a second, and walked over to where Dave was trying to get up off of the floor, slipping around in the spilled beer.  “Serves you right, dick!  How did that feel?  Maybe you can sing some of the higher backups now, yeah?”  He continued laughing and didn’t bother helping Dave off the ground.  Stone looked over at Eddie and, seeing the rage written plainly on his face, he could tell that it wasn’t going to be good.  Quickly, he walked over and took me by the arm.
                “Come on,” he said, “let’s go take a walk for a minute.”  He led me out the door in a flash and gently rubbed my back while he walked beside me.
                “I’m really sorry about that.  Dave can be a real moron sometimes.  He shouldn’t have done that, at all.  No excuses.”
                “Hey, don’t apologize for his ass.  I can take care of myself,” I replied, wondering exactly why Stone had whisked me out of the room like that.  I figured it had something to do with Eddie.  He looked so entirely pissed back there that his eyes were almost turning black.
                “I can see you’re the type of girl who’s got her own back… I didn’t mean to imply you need looking after, I just think it’d be better to let Ed and Jeff deal with that situation behind closed doors.  I try not to be involved in the periodic attitude adjustments that Dave seems to need every so often.”  His eyes glazed over a little bit before he added, “A little too often.”  
                “Uh-oh, sounds like a little band mate tension going on there.”  Stone looked down at the ground, obviously feeling like he had said too much.  I got the feeling I shouldn’t pry any further.  Time to vacuum up the awkward, Iz.  “It’s fine—if there’s one thing I understand it’s band mate squabbles.  Been there,” I added, laughing under my breath.  That seemed to put Stone more at ease.  “Hey, you wanna grab a drink and sit the hell down?  I’ve been dying for a beer and a seat.”  Stone smiled at my sympathetic change of subject.  
                “You bet,” he answered enthusiastically, directing me to a nearby cooler and a couple of folding chairs.  “Let’s chat.  I’m curious what, besides your obvious ability to be a bad ass, has Eddie in such a state over you…”  
               “State?  What state?” I asked hastily, feeling shy again and wondering how I could have let it get so hot and heavy with Eddie back in the dressing room.  In reality, I had no idea what his intentions were!
               “Well, I mean, he couldn’t stop talking about your band after you guys finished soundcheck.  He was walking around mumbling like a broken record—wouldn’t stop repeating ‘that voice, that voice’.  Told me he had to talk to you, had to find out who you were.  Trust me, Ed’s not the kind of guy who gets silly over a pretty face unless he feels like there’s something worthwhile underneath it.  He must think damn highly of you,” spouted Stone.
               “Pretty face!  Oh, come on… I was wearing a mustache,” I exclaimed, my face growing hotter and hotter.  That was my attempt to downplay my looks—something I was in the bad habit of doing from time to time.
               “Ah, cut it out.  You’re lovely, my dear.  Everybody can see that.”  He paused and looked at me as I fidgeted nervously in my chair.  “It’s all right, you can trust Ed—I mean, if that’s what you’re worried about, you can trust him to be a decent guy.  I’ve never known him to be anything other.  He never chases women.  We were all starting to think he was asexual for a while there,” Stone laughed.  “Really, he just hates all the attention we’ve been getting lately and he wants substance from the people he chooses to let in—he wants it to be genuine, that’s all.”
                I blushed a little and smiled, not really knowing what to say.  It sounded like Eddie was the real thing: a good man.  Grabbing a Corona and popping it open with just my teeth, I leaned back in my chair and sighed.  Maybe my impulsive behavior wasn’t so bad? 
               “See?” Stone said through a belly laugh.  “You’re a total badass.”  I spat the beer bottle cap all the way into a trash can about ten feet to the right.  It landed with a perfect “clink”.  I flashed Stone the cheesiest of cheesy grins, showing all my teeth, and winked at him.  He laughed some more, just shaking his head, and we started into a mile-a-minute conversation that somehow meandered to the subject of left wing politics.