OCEANS ➳ Andrew Hozier-Byrne

Chapter One // Part 1

Last Orders - Nothing But Thieves

📍 County Wicklow, Ireland.

As soon as we walked in, we were greeted with sounds of laughter and beer glasses clinking. This place didn't seem like the ordinary bars you'd usually find in Australia. Instead, the mahogany wood walls and dim lighting brought about this unique warmth which instantly made me feel at ease.

Not too far from the drinks bar were a couple of unreserved red velvet couches. Most people were either sitting back relaxing at dinner tables, throwing darts, competing over a game of pool, or at the bar itself.

"I'm going to find the bathroom, Jack."

Within a split second, he heads straight towards the bar and orders himself a Guinness.

It had only been about a week in Ireland and we've fought nearly everyday. This all started a few months ago, towards the lead up to our UK travels. Our feelings towards each other slowly began to fade. It had felt as though something was tearing us apart, but it seemed like there was no answer to it.

Tonight was just another typical night with him. He had taken me out for dinner at this beautiful ocean Bar and Grill to "sincerely apologise" for his immature behaviour lately. But of course, I bought none of it.
The number of times he has apologised was not worth counting anymore. I felt hopeless after the first month of his new, somewhat coward behaviour. What once were genuinely really funny jokes had now become offensive, his touch became unaffectionate, and not to mention his mood swings which would aftermath in excessive drinking.
But my question was, "why"?

I would try my hardest to seek out some form of answer, from every little thing he would do. But all that I really noticed was his increased time spent on his phone. The way he'd look at it, throwing in a few small smirks here and there, everyday and every night. For whatever reason, this seemed to have boosted his ego to the clouds. This extreme raise in confidence had turned him cocky, and yet somewhat scary.

I sigh as I walk around the corner, not really watching where I was going and then suddenly I bump into a tall guy.

"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry!"

"No, no! Don't be. We'll.. blame these lights."

It took us a few good seconds to analyse this not so big of a deal situation. His eyes were fixated on mine and his smile was just noticeable due to the extremely dim lighting in the hallway.

In this moment, it seemed as if everything slowed down. From people's conversations to the seconds itself. Slowly, we walk around each other and almost instantly, he disappears from view.

➳

Stepping out from the hallway corner once again revealed the liveliness that was concealed within the cosy building. I spot Jack at the bar with what looks like an empty glass asking for another. Tonight seemed to be another moody night for him.

Instead of joining him, I already subconsciously decide to make my way to the empty couches located in the corner.

I couldn't help but watch all the loved up couples enjoying themselves at their dinner tables. Laughing away, arms  around each other, hands holding one another.
Yes, I was jealous and no, I wasn't afraid to admit that.

-

"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry."

Now, who are you? A fresh-face I have never seen around this bar before. Her accent had the slightest English touch to it, though it seemed to be Australian. I could just make out her features. Now I love mood lighting and all but these lights are shockingly annoying in this moment of time.

"No, no! Don't be. We'll.. blame these lights."

My response seemed to make her shy. She falls out of her little stare and continues walking, holding onto the back of her neck with her head down. I watch her to the last second before returning back to my corner which was all set up.

11:17pm

Just another 15 minutes and you're finished for the night.

Instead of kicking me out after the last set, Kieran, the bar manager lets me stay in for some drinks after my gigs are finished. His son and I went to the same school and used to be quite good mates.

Tonight's performance just consisted of covers that I've been practicing alone for in the past few months. I tend to save my own songs for when my band and I perform in bigger venues.

Honestly, I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life.
I only discovered my voice at the age of eighteen. Before that, I couldn't even imagine myself singing in front of people, let alone listening to myself sing. Writing was a passion of mine and I guess that stemmed out into writing lyrics for songs. Those small songs slowly began to take shape and now they've become a part of my first ever EP.

I take a seat in the small little stool, fumble around trying to get myself back into the swing of things and check the next song in my last set. This, I've been dying to perform.

"Right... so glad I was able to perform to you all tonight. Erm... this next song is 'Oceans' by Seafret."