Mistaken

Why?

I sit in the lobby quickly tapping my foot, urging for my name to be called. "How did my life end up like this? Why are you here Renee? Keep it. No don't be stupid your not ready yet." My mind argues with itself.

Silently thinking to myself as the question "why am I here?" Lingers in my mind. "Renee Clarkson" a nurse calls, I stand as she motions for me to follow her.

We walk down this long hallway where I see my reflection many times through the windows of the doors. We eventually come to a stop and enter a room that looks very similar to a doctors check up room.

She starts checking me out like a doctor would to it's patient. "Can you turn your head that way for me please" she asks taking the ear tool and checking out my ears.

"Yo I'm here for a check up why you gotta do all this?" I ask kinda annoyed. "I have to check you first before I give you the medicine to make sure your healthy enough for this kind of surgery. "Ight bro do wat you gotta do" I say with a huff not really feeling the argument anymore.

I follow the rest of her commands until they're gone, then she starts asking me questions. "Okay now what brings you to the abortion clinic..." she starts off "what you mean the one in Compton, cause this where I'm from" I say with attitude looking at her disgustingly sticking out my neck as if we have a problem.

"And before you get smart with me I mean what are you getting today and what is your reason for abortion" she reassured. "Oh Ight, I'm getting just a normal abortion just take the baby out and I'm gone." "Okay and why are getting the baby aborted" "because it was an accident, I don't got the money for it, and I just don't want it periodttt ya heard" "okay yes I heard" we talk for a little while longer before she eventually leaves the room.

Leaving me in my thoughts I think back over all of the events that have happened so far in my life. My eyes well up with tears from how I think about my life. "I'm a 17 year old pregnant nobody. Why are you so stupid? Nobody loves you. He was right when he said "nobody will ever love you" What if you die in the process. Does your life even matter? Who cares about you. You know how many people been lookin' at you probably criticizin' tsk shame." Thoughts flood my mind.

I flee to wipe my eyes when I hear the door knob jiggle. "Get yourself together Renee. The doctor walks in and instructs me to follow him I follow him to a surgical room and follow his commands. The next thing I know is he tells me to take in a deep breath somehow knowing I don't like needles.

He sneaks the needle under my skin within the breath. "Ow" I squeal breathing in sharply and trying to spring my arm out of his grasp. "I'm sorry Renee" is the last thing I hear before darkness overtakes my vision and I enter a deep sleep.