deere oneshots !!

comfort [deere] (a->f)

i actually wrote most of this months ago for my friend lmao so here's what i have to give

TW: BRIEF MENTIONS OF ABUSE ((i personally headcanon that jeremy's mom.. wasn't the best))

jeremy couldn't tell how long he'd been crying. he groaned as his vision grew blurry yet again; he hated feeling like this. feeling so hopeless. he shut off his phone and tossed it aside, curling up and gripping onto one of his pillows. he laid there for a long while, overthinking every tiny detail of every single action he'd made in the past that he could think of. and eventually, his phone went off. sniffling, he shuffled around, grabbing it and turning it on.

message from jakey boy 💕 (3)

jeremy tapped on the notification, practically indifferent. silent tears still flowed, and the only sound to be heard in the room were sniffles and hiccups he still made. before he could read the messages, he was recieving a call. jake. he sighed softly, and picked it up, holding his phone to his ear.

"hey 'miah," jeremy could practially hear the other boy's smile, and the pale boy smiled sadly to himself. "..are you there?" jeremy nodded in reply, despite the fact that jake couldn't see him. he sniffled.

"..yeah. i'm here." he mumbled, sounding nothing less than miserable.

"..are you crying?"

"..no."

"..i called to let you know i'm on my way back home. do you need anything?"

"no, i'm fine."

"..okay, well, i'll see you soon, babe. i love you."

"..love you too." jeremy mumbled, watching as he ended their call. jake's voice almost always calmed him, but he was in far too deep this time. tears filled his eyes for what seemed like the hundredth time as he tossed his phone onto one of the beanbags across his room. turning and hugging onto his pillow again, he sulked alone in his self-doubt.

he cried silently, something he'd learned to do well when he was young. he could never cry unless there was no one around to see or hear him doing so. his mother would only hurt him when he didn't, claiming that 'men aren't allowed to cry'. his thoughts only began to get darker, and he nearly let out a choked sob. nearly.

thankfully, the sound of the front door opening interrupted his thoughts. he heard a bit of shuffling, and then steps coming upstairs. he laid still, unable to turn his body around. he didn't want to move. he just wanted to disappear in that very moment. he was always ashamed with himself when he'd cry. he did it often, and he hated himself for it. he didn't want to overthink so much, he didn't want to believe jake doesn't love him. he didn't--

weight shifted on the bed. jeremy could hear as jake sat a few things aside, but then felt jake lay down and spoon him, and then a hand in his hair.

the lanky boy sniffled and turned around, swiftly hiding his face by digging it into jake's shoulder. he gripped onto the back of his shirt, and jake could tell he was still crying. the jock frowned, and slowly rubbed the lanky boy's back in attempt to calm him.

"hey.. you're okay. i'm here now." he promised. "what got you like this?"

"i just... i was doing fine, a-and then i just.. i started thinking.. thinking a little too much." jeremy breathed out, his voice being no louder than a raspy whisper. "i'm.. i'm scared you'll stop caring for me when someone better comes.. i-i don't want that to happen.. i'll be-.. b-be so.. sssso..." jeremy broke down yet again, continuing to cry against his boyfriend's shoulder.

"..i love you so much, remmy. you're my entire world, and i wouldn't trade you for anything. if anyone tells you otherwise, i need you to believe that i'm here for you. always." jake whispered, gently kissing the top of jeremy's head as he went and calmly rubbed his back. hearing this almost made jeremy guilty. he felt that jake had to go out of his way to do this for him. but he wanted to think of this positively. he needed to. for jake. he pulled away from his boyfriend, sighing softly as he calmed himself and wiped his face with his sleeve.

"thank you.. i just.. i'm sorry."

"you have no reason to be sorry.. i think it's just human to be doubtful. anyways, what i'm saying is true. i love you. a lot. and i'm so happy to be in this world where i'm able to show you that." jeremy sighed softly, closing his eyes and relaxing his aching face.

"i love you, too." finally feeling the comfort he needed, jeremy relaxed, arms wrapped around jake.

"nap time?" jake inquired, smiling slightly as he looked down at the other boy. jeremy nodded, smiling slightly.

"nap time." he replied, leaning up to lazily kiss jake's cheek before relaxing against him and promptly falling asleep.

word count: 805
sorry the ending was sort of half assed lmao