Susan Of Narnia

Chapter Ten: The Conversation

"How came you to hear of that?" Susan hissed, looking all about her lest anyone overhear either of them. Mr and Mrs Bryant were too far away, both of them talking to an older man. Carl stood in the midst of a group of friends, holding a glass high as if making a flippant toast.

Had Carl sent Francis to test her? But, no. Carl wouldn't want to involve another person. He'd question Susan himself or send her away. That was the sort of man Carl was.

Francis, too, searched the people around them before answering. Then whispering, Francis said, "A long while ago I heard Ji—my sister talking with your sib—some friends. I was only sneaking up on them to play a prank, but then I found myself listening."

Susan raised an eyebrow. "Haven't you heard that eavesdropping is a very naughty habit?"

Francis laughed loudly, causing a few people close to them to turn and smile. "That's only true if you're caught—I've never been caught at any of my antics."

Somehow his laughter eased Susan's weary spirit a little, and she smiled.

Francis continued, "I noticed something different about my sister after she became friends with your cousin. I don't know how to describe it, but it wasn't the sort of normal difference that comes over a girl when she falls for a boy. Jill was more ... confident? No, that's not the word. She was much more than just that. My parents just thought her change was due to infatuation. But I knew that was impossible, because she was happy even when things went wrong, and Eustace wasn't able to be around. She wasn't stuck in some girlish dream world of fashion and lipstick, but seemed solid and sure about life. And she nearly drove all of us insane talking about God all the time."

Susan picked at the tucks in her skirt. "You think this is because of Narnia?"

"Partly," Francis said. "But I think it's much deeper than just the place. As if she learned something very important there, and that knowledge is what changed her. I always wanted to ask her, but felt foolish whenever I tried. And now it's too late—except you. I know that they said you had been there, too. Please, won't you tell me anything? I feel as if I must know of this place."

Susan swallowed away her surprise and searched out for Carl. It took several long seconds to find him because he'd moved on to a new group of friends. But he was still too far to hear them talking. And he didn't even seem aware that they were talking. Carl was completely oblivious to her.

"To believe in Narnia is pure insanity," Susan answered at last. "Such a place is impossible."

Francis retorted, "To believe in anything might be risking the mind—yet we must believe or surely give in to insanity altogether."

Susan didn't wish to argue, especially when her own mind felt ready to break if she didn't agree. So she said nothing. And the silence grew longer until she thought Francis might get up and leave out of concession.

"I just want to know if there's a way I can get there ... I want to see this world."

"It won't bring Jill back," Susan said, knowing it was mean, but unable to keep the words inside.

"I know," Francis sighed. "But maybe it would help me understand it all better. And I really want to understand."

Susan murmured, "I already tried to go back. Of course, He did tell me that I would never be able to return to Narnia. Still, the way I tried should have at least taken me to the wood—"

"The wood?" Francis asked.

"It's a sort of world between worlds that leads me to all the rest. But I couldn't get there."