Damian Wayne : One Shots

You Can Cook?!

Damian's league of assassin past is quite dark and he was therefore required to learn many skills at a very young age. Whose to say that cooking isn't one of them.
Warning: this may portray some characters from the teen titans team as assholes. You have been warned.
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"Hey guys, I'm hungry" said said Beast  boy suddenly as their watching TV.
Jaime aka blue beetle looks up from the screen snorts,"When are you not?"
"Seriously guys, I'm starving. Let's order pizza" whined Beast boy
"We've been eating fast food all week. I want something home cooked." Raven declared.
"I can make a traditional tamaranian supper if you'd like" offered Starfire.
"No!" came a collective cry from everyone startling the tamaranian.
"I mean.... you really don't have to..because... Umm... You've been doing everything else like organizing team trainings and stuff." Jaime lied.
No one could bare to tell her the truth about her horrible cooking skills for fear of breaking her heart. Besides she really had been working hard to fulfill all of their needs. She deserved a break.
Starfire gave a nod and a smile.
"Jaime you work at a restaurant, don't you?Why don't you make something?" said Beast boy.
"Hey, I just ended my 6 hour shift an hour ago. I need a break." defended the blue beetle.
"Well, I can't cook to save my life so that leaves only Raven and Robin." points out beast boy.
"Don't even think about it" deadpan Raven giving Beast boy her most deadly glare. He wisely shuts up.
"So  what about Damian. He's the ' son of Batman.' I'm sure he could make Mac n cheese or a sandwich at least. " reasons Jaime. Garfield gives him a 'really' look.
"Well, why don't we ask Damian." suggests Kori.
"Ask me what?" says the teen in question as he walks into the living room.
"To make us food" Raven replies bluntly.
"Why would I do that?" asks Damian with an eyebrow raised.
"Because you skipped washing the dishes yesterday even though it was your turn" answers Blue beetle with a smug look.
"but Nightwing called me and said I was needed for backup  in Bludehaven and everyone else was busy" protests Damian.
"Still doesnt change the fact that you missed it." beast boy answers in a sing song voice.
Damian grumbled something inaudible.
"Besides, it's not like you can make anything actually decent." remarks Beast boy not-so-quietly.
"Hey!" Damian mock whines trying to hid the real hurt that their belief that he couldn't do something domestic brought.
"it's true" blue beetle says shrugging his shoulders as he turns his attention back to the TV screen .
"That's enough now" says Starfire before things could escalate further.
Raven offered Damian a sympathatic look but says nothing. Damian resigns into the kitchen but, unknown to the team, has a determined look in his eyes.

        ~time gap to 10 minutes later~

"Hey, do any of you know what he's even making." asks Garfield.
Jaime gives him a weird look,"you must be really hungry."
"Duh" says Garfield.
Suddenly a phone starts ringing.
"Whose phone is that?" asks Garfield.
"It appears that Damian left his phone here" says Kori picking up the device.
"Should we give it to him? " asks Raven.
"Nah, I'm to lazy to get off this couch and I'm sure none of you wanna get up either." says beast boy slouching further onto the couch.
Jaime shrugs, "we'll give it to him when he calls us for food"
The phone rings again. They ignore it.
It then rings a third time.
"Ugh, can someone answer and tell whoever this impatient person is that Damian can't talk right now."groans Beast boy.
Jaime reaches over to grab the phone and answers.

" Hello" he starts.
"Hey, Damia-wait your not Damian"
"Yeah, he's busy in the kitchen right now, can I pass on a message."
"Yah tell him that Maya calle-wait did you say kitchen"
"yah, he's cooking, unbelievable right? "
"Damian's cooking?! Oh My God! He's at Titans tower right?"
"yes but-"
"Okay gotta go bye!"

Jaime stares at the phone with a weirded out expression.
"Okay that was weird" he concludes finally.
The others give him a questioning look but no more is said on the subject.