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YOUR HATE AND ABUSE CUTS MY SKIN WITH EVER WORD YOU SPEAK , YOU LEAVE A DEEP SCAR THAT LEAVES A MEMORY OF PAIN  SO DEEP THAT I CANT ESCAPE . EVERYDAY I CRY    HOPING AND WISHING TOMMORROW  WILL GET BETTER BUT IT DOES NOT . EVERYDAY WORDS OF FAGGOT, FATTY, LAZY, STUPID, DUMB,  AND WORTHLESS  SWIRL AROUND MY BRAIN . TODAYS SCAPGOAT , TOMMORROWS VICTIM .  DULLING THE PAIN DOESNT WORK NOT AS EVERYONE SEEMS TO THINK . I HAVE TRIED BOOZE , I HAVE TRIED PILLS. WEED JUST MAKES ME LAUGH AND I DONT WANT TO LAUGH ,IT JUST PUSHES THE PAIN AWAY FOR AWHILE UNTIL IT RETURNS . I HAVE TRIED CUTING BUT IT JUST MAKES THE PAIN WORSE .  YOU DONT REALIZE THE PAIN YOU CAUSED ME  OR THE EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER  YOU FORCED ME ONTO BY YOUR CONSTANT  WORDS OF PAIN AND ABUSE  ONE OF THESE DAYS YOU MAY WAKE UP TO FIND THAT I AM NO LONGER HERE FOR YOU TO BULLY , THAT I HAVE DECIDED TO LEAVE YOU TO YOUR OWN SELF HATE .  JUST KNOW THIS INSIDE YOUR ARE DEAD TO ME YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN DEAD TO ME . THE MOMENT YOU GAVE ME UP AS A CHILD YOU WERE DEAD TO ME . THE MOMENT  YOU FIRST UTTERED THE WORDS FAGGOT YOU WERE DEAD TO ME , THE MOMENT YOU  TREATED MY SISTERS LIKE THEY WERE BETTER THAN ME YOU WERE DEAD TO ME ,  ALL THE LIES ,ALL THE PAIN ,ALL THE SORROW . MOTHER YOU ARE DEAD TO ME .