the strings

:: one ::

To put it plainly, love sucks.

Now, before you toss this book away because who wants to read a book with a bitter narrator, hear me out.

I don’t hate love. I don’t hate on couples, and I don’t hate on the concept of love in general. What I hate is this screwed up misconception of what the world thinks love is.

The world has screwed us all over with its boundaries and rules about love, and things to follow and to do and not to do. Love isn’t just about loving someone anymore. Love comes with strings.

You have to say all the right things, hold hands in public, do all the correct social stuff, and overall love has become a bundle of stress.

Love sucks.                                                                                             

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I had this boyfriend my freshman year of high school, and from then I swore I wouldn’t date any more in high school, and maybe never. He was a football  jock, and a pretty typical one at that. I thought I was in love with him, as all fourteen year old girls are convinced of when a handsome boy tells them they’re pretty.

God, was I mistaken.

He turned out to, of course, only want me for my looks. I don’t remember when he dropped me exactly, probably somewhere around the time Ellie got sick and I stopped going to parties with him. Once I no longer helped his social status, he was done.

I was so mad and hurt for the longest time at him, but after a while I just became angry at myself that I would ever allow someone to use me that way.

And now all love is fickle.

(Just kidding, but I am pretty biased against high school love nowadays).

Anyways, I don’t date. Haven’t dated since then, in fact. It’s the start of senior year now, and I’m the freak who doesn’t have a boyfriend.  And when your high school is roughly the size of a postage stamp, that’s kind of noticeable. Because, I’m not like unattractive. That sounds horrible, and you’ve probably just put the book down if you haven’t already, but I mean, I’m just stating facts here.

I’m not ugly.

So it’s kind of weird that I don’t and haven’t had a boyfriend, especially since there’s nothing fundamentally wrong with me or anything.

I digress.

The thing about high school love, is 9.99 times out of ten, it doesn’t last. People split up when they go off to college, or they split up because they found their significant other making out with someone else in the supply closet, or one of them breaks their neck mudding. (No lie, that last one actually happened twice last year. Small towns, man. They kill.)

So why even date in high school? It just seems kind of pointless to me to change your relationship status on Facebook for three minutes before changing it back.

So yeah. Don’t do love, kids.

I give you this as a preface to my personality, but also to prepare you for meeting my best friend, who doesn’t exactly share my viewpoint.

She practically mauls me as soon as I walk in the front doors of the school, and I end up inhaling a large amount of perfume and glitter. Awesome.

She’s giddy, because it’s her one year anniversary with her boyfriend – which I know because I woke up to seven texts from her freaking out about it. Literally, my entire screen was filled with capital letters and heart emoticons.