Sean and Kaycee one shots

3. Am I beautiful yet

Trigger warning- eating disorders

If thats not your cup of tea then feel free to skip this one

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kaycee pov

I sit down at the table. A hamburger and fries sat in front of me. I just stared at it. I didn't want to eat it but at the same time i wanted it so bad. I knew that if i took one bite i wouldn't be able to help but finish it. Thats why i needed to leave it. Food is like a drug to me, its addicting and i feel i need to get myself off of it.

I hate that i feel this way but i cant help it. Ive tried ignoring it and just being normal but it always finds its way back. It doesn't matter what i do, its made itself at home in my mind. I knew it was only a little bit of time before it started getting worse. Making my already hella screwed up eating patterns worse. I want to help make other people feel comfortable with themselves but how am i ment to do that if this is what im doing to myself.

You might be wondering what caused this and the truth is i dont really know. I guess being in the dance industry and putting myself online finally started taking its toll on me. It started with wanting to be more fit and healthy. It all started with watching what i eat and exercising more but that soon turned into dieting and over exercising. Eventually i started purging and then restricting. Its not healthy and i know this but i cant stop these thoughts. Im not in control even though i like to tell myself i am

"Kayc are you okay?" my mom asks when she realizes i haven't even touched the burger.

"Yeah" reply a little to fast "I was planning on eating at Seans after we rehearse"

I hate how easy the lying has become. Its like second nature to me now. I hate lying to my parents but theres no other way im going to get away with this.

10 minutes later

I see Sean pull into the driveway and run outside after telling my parents bye.

When we get to his house we head to his garage to start rehearsing, But not before Sean stops in the kitchen.

"Do you want a snack or anything" he asks.

"Im good I ate way to much food earlier i think im gonna be sick if i eat anymore" i reply hoping he believes me. If anyone would see past my lies it would be Sean.

He just nods but i can tell hes questioning if i was being truthful or not. We head to the garage and start rehearsing. We were practicing a choreography he came up with and wanted to teach. We decided to teach another partner class not long ago.

Sean POV

We started practicing lifts for the duet. I noticed she felt lighter, I didn't think much of it at first but that changed quickly once i realized how prominent her bones were. It scared me. It most likely was nothing, but i cant help but get concerned when it comes to her.

"Kayc are you ok you seem a lot lighter" i question hoping it doesn't come off wrong.

"I guess the exercising is paying off" Kaycee replies seeming lost in her thoughts.

"Promise me you aren't overdoing it" i say with concern.

"Pinkie promise" she says.

I didn't believe her something was up and if it didn't seem that way before then it definitely did now. She was hiding her other hand but i caught a glimpse of it. She was crossing her fingers. Somethings up. Obviously the worst thoughts started coming to my mind. She cant have an eating disorder shes to comfortable with herself. But she couldn't promise to not overdue it.