Hello, Venessa. It's me! The girl that you thought you knew. The girl that was quiet and shy, the girl that people walked all over.
I want to thank you, you showed me how fake people can be, how much I just can't trust people. It really made me think "who can i trust?" and the answer to my beautifully innocent question is: no one. Not my best friend since kindergarten, Not my gay best friend.
You turned me into the person i've always wanted to be. The one that speaks her mind. The girl i used to hide so that you would like me, How pathetic of me. I really thought we had something, but i guess not. You say that i treated you bad, have you forgotten who threw you a birthday party because no one else wanted to? Have you forgotten who wrote you letters when you didn't feel good? How you forgotten whose shoulder you cried on when he broke up with you? I guess you have.
I hope you and your new friends get along well. I heard they're drama queens but if that's the kind of people you want to hang around with then i'm glad you found them. You seem happier. Sorry i couldn't do that for you. Please, believe me when i say id do anything for you, because i will.
You say i'm the fake friend. But do fake friends cut everyone off so that you didn't get jealous? Do fake friends cut the world off to give you all the attention? I'd say that's more of a devoted friend. But we have different perspectives i guess.
You made me happy, even when you made me cry. It made me happy when you talked to me, even if you were just mad at me. I was happy when you hugged me, even if it was the last hug you gave me. But i didn't do that for you, and i'm sorry.
You said i was clingy. Was caring too much clingy? I'm sorry about that too. It seems as though you never cared for me the way i cared for you. I begged you to come over you said you had plans with your best friend, but i thought i was your best. That's what you always told me. we were both wrong about that.
Her, the other girl you ditched me for. She's nothing but drama, why can't you see that? She hurt me because of you. You didn't care but that's ok, I can handle myself. Or so I thought. her face so close to mine, Her hands balled up ready to hurt. And the moment she stroke was the moment you walked in and laughed. You said nothing, and recorded it. How could you do that to me? After all the fights i got into to protect you, you instigate. that was the second i realized you werent the person i thought you were. You were selfish and you wanted all the attention. Well now you got it.
Are you happy now that you've destroyed the only true friend you had? You cut me off completely. It hurt. I never let my emotions show because i wanted to be strong for you. But today i don't care anymore i sat there and cried, i sobbed. I screamed in pain of losing you. But you didn't care. You sat there and smiled with your friends. Never stopped to think of the pain you put me through. But that's ok. I forgive you, because i love you.
Soon you'll come to realize the kind of friend i was. Soon you'll want me back. Soon you come crying to me because of the pain they put you through. And when that day comes i'll forgive you. But I'll never forget what you did to me. And thats why ill never let you break into my wall that i so carefully crafted while you cut me off. I've been doing better now than i was when we were friends. Funny,huh? I did things that i never would have done if i was still friends with you. If i would have told you that i was interested you would've told me that i wasn't good enough to do it.
But here i am, The first chair in a district wide band all because i wanted to show you that i could do better than you. And when they announced my name through the whole school, i saw the jealousy in you face. It made me happy that for once i did something better than you.
The other members of you new squad were just as mean as you were and i didnt even know them. They couldn't hurt me. I was numb after what you and her did to me. Completely numb. I could take anything now. I don't care.
so , thank you for showing me how many haters i have how many fake friends i had. How many mistakes i made. Also a huge that you for making the person i am. The person you always wanted to be, the person you never became.
Love, your ex-best friend
